Vacation’s Over

by Brock Dorsey on June 6, 2018

Ass-tier beta male hacker Tulio Baars ran out of money to keep knocking Death Metal Underground offline. Tulio, you feminine slab of loserdom, that’s all ya got? All that “special Google and NASA training” for a couple weeks of 404? Was it really worth destroying your career for that, as any future employer will google your name and see the related pictures? Did the Brazil trucker strikes knock your village’s power offline, did you get starved off by the lack of food? Will you be taking a helicopter ride once the Third Empire of Brazil is instated in the Chilean fashion?

Tulio, my man, I’m disappointed. I was really enjoying my vacation time, got some beach time in with my hot trad waifu, even got to try that new Mediterranean place down on 66th and 2nd. But now thanks to your technical shortcomings, it looks it’s back to work for me and the DMU staff.

Thanks to all our readers for your patience, with full assumptions that you had better shit to do than to keep entering deathmetal.org into your browsers every few hours. Also, thanks to everyone who visited us at our DMU in exile 8chan board at www.8ch.net/deathmetal/ and went ruthless with the shitposting. Perhaps we will keep it up, and make some rounds there. Barring any more whiny techfag meltdowns, DMU will be back to the usual sadism and destruction tomorrow with an immeasurably stronger resolve and more beta male smashing mayhem. Lefties, soy metallers, fake metal news outlets, and social justice warriors on suicide watch!!! Sodomize the weak!!!

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The War Continues: Temporary Solutions to the DMU Cyberwar

by Brock Dorsey on May 20, 2018

While some loser-in-life Huffington Post reporter named Tulio Baars (the magazine does not typically employ males) continues spending his mommy and daddy’s money on a botnet to launch cyber attacks on Death Metal Underground, a temporary backup solution has been created for Hessians to get their fix of metal chaos and destruction.

An official DMU 8chan imageboard has been created and can be found at https://8ch.net/deathmetal and we’ll host all of our articles there for the time being until the Brasilia Policia catch up with Tulio.  On this board anyone (including readers) can make posts there or engage in articles.  Just don’t be a pussy!

And for the record, DMU is not- nor ever was- an Alt-Right or white nationalist website.  We have never once have written about race.  So if you think you’re a left-wing liberal crusader doing the word a service by shutting down a niche metal website you’re just retarded and probably confused about your sexual orientation.

For everyone else, thanks for still visiting here despite these pansies knocking the site offline for a couple of weeks.

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Thrift Store Alert! Judas Iscariot to Get the Re-Release Treatment

by Brock Dorsey on May 11, 2018

Of all of the bands and all of the musicians that have come out of retirement in attempt to cash in on their past, Judas Iscariot’s Akhenetan (Andrew Harris) has been one rare exception who has truly vanished into the depths of obscurity for good.  Responsible for starting the careers of both Moribund Records and Krieg, Harris’s Judas Iscariot was once the most popular American black metal band.  Formed in the days where Euronymous was still alive, JI played in the long-form Darkthrone style and memorably used (albeit poorly understood) Nietzsche Nilisist lyrics.  But after a celebrated career of mediocre black metal was capped off with a wild family campaign scandal in 2002 (more on that in a moment), Akhenetan laid down his axe and disappeared forever.

But in an age where metal thrift-stores like Nuclear War Now! and their cronies will resell whatever refurbished sonic garbage they can find, Ascension Monuments Media has decided to dig up the rotted corpse of Judas Iscariot for another dose of record store necrophilia.  Run by none other than Nachtmystium’s Blake Judd (oh shit! hide your wallets!), AMM is re-releasing tons of old Judas Iscariot vinyls and a super secret, unreleased (rejected) album called An Ancient Starry Sky.

While Akhenetan himself remains in long board room meetings with corporate banker swine, Judd and his label have successfully wrestled away the rights to almost all the music not released by Moribund (whose royalty rights are locked away in a chest in Odin Thompson’s basement).  So how does this material hold up nearly 20 years later, to a scene and a world that’s turned completely upside down?  What can we expect from this latest endeavor of hipster metal mania?  And just why did the most popular American black metal musician of the 90’s go into complete exile, never to return?

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IntelDrop.txt

by Staff on May 9, 2018

SEC_Test
Coms>Open
WAR ABOUND
USAorg>Under Fire
Why Brazil?
Coordinated Attack
THINK
Altright.com>DEAD
What are THEY trying to silence?
What is too DANGEROUS?
Narrative shift
Public Awakening
BIGGER THAN METAL
Who is behind?
Huffpo?Google?NASA?
TRUST[VJ]
Countermeasures in play
Target(3)
Candi Canes anyone?
HELLO TULIO
We see all
We know all
Take your Prozak
HAPPY HUNTING
Enjoy the Show
– C

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DMU UNDER SIEGE

by Brock Dorsey on May 8, 2018

Death Metal Underground has been under heavy DDOS attacks for the past 3 days due to our alliance with the right wing website Amerika.  Amerika appears to be under siege as part of the mass censorship campaign that has gotten AltRight.com kicked off their server.  The collateral damage has also affected DMU and kept us off the web for several days.

Under Brett’s orders we have broken formation and appear to be out of the killzone.  Thus comms are back online, and Death Metal Underground may continue its crusade against leftism and false metal. Amerika remains in the bunkers, engaging the enemy.

Fortunately, we know where the attacks are coming from (ips, emails) and who is behind them (personal and family social media accounts). Our countermeasures and next course of action will remain covert at this time.  Meanwhile, keep checking back for more updates. We will not be silenced.

Semper Fidelis,

~Brock

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Some Thoughts on Nature

by Charles Stuart on April 22, 2018

I enjoy camping. Solitude. Enjoying primitive conditions. Witnessing the power and beauty of nature. It helps one keep a good Hessian frame of mind. I try to go as often as is possible and there is one location near me that I frequent rather often. After a bit of a drive over old logging roads through the hills I stop and pull my car off the side of the road and put on my pack and get my rifle at port arms. To get to my favoured camping area it is a 5 mile hike that for a short while follows an abandoned narrow-gauge railroad that some logging company built to expedite the extraction of resources from the area many years back. The place I like to set up camp is a tiny, elevated clearing in the pine trees next to a small creek from which I can get water. The area is a temperate rain forest of sorts, so there are 3-6 foot tall ferns everywhere, and in old-growth areas that have not fallen prey to logging, you can see the triple-canopy growth that is common to all rain forests. However, most of the forests around have been logged at some point so this sight is rare. I use a small shovel or a machete to clear out the ferns so I have a nice place to build a camp fire and an area to lay out my sleeping bag. The chopped down ferns double as a nice mattress.

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Polarized Metal Genres Must Unite Against The Funderground

by Sawyer Clark on April 13, 2018

Metal is facing a decisive moment in time. As a genre and an entire sub culture, it’s threatened with a massive flux of outsider interest into what was once an isolated community forged in passion. Metal was a cause for tight bonds among like minded disillusioned youth that wanted nothing to do with the status quo, a lawless free for all where no ideology or point of view was too extreme. Thus grew a voice to rally against the farce of mainstream politics, social acceptability, resolute contentment with mundane lifestyles and herd mentality. Though acts like Black Sabbath and Iron Maiden were to find great success within the public large, they laid the groundwork for that rebel yell that gave the disgruntled youth the foundations for connecting with others so disconnected. And with such a ground roots movement that metal was, true artists and musicians who may have never have been given an opportunity to rise otherwise were now rising and exponentially so. Quickly NWOBHM became speed metal became death metal became black metal. Then, as with all great explosive cultural movements, metal began losing its traction and sight of its original goals of fighting against the mainstream culture of quantity over quality. But it is now that we see its greatest threat in its acceptance by the masses. Now it is being taken for a boutique exotic exploration into what most really don’t want to explore: cold unforgiving reality.

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We Merry Few

by Charles Stuart on March 11, 2018

For the older among us, being in a band was something of a badge of honour; sure, there were more than a few bands around, but not so many that it was still worth comment when people learned you played in one. Musicians were and are not all that common, but music scenes are inherently incestuous and the number of bands expands until nearly every musician is leader of his own that features players from other bands. It was comradely, fractious, fun, and instructive. But in the modern music world the concept of the band is in rapid decline.
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