Pushback Against SJW Invasion Of Metal Begins With Anti-Metalsucks Campaign

Sometimes recognizing parasites becomes difficult. They sidle up to your genre, think that is fairly cool and they want a piece of that action, and then they morph themselves into clones of the fans of that genre. Then they shlurp their way inside of its cell walls, consume its vital energy, and inject their DNA into its core, replacing all that made it unique and meaningful. (more…)

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SAD HIPSTER WREST EVICTED FROM WAREHOUSE

Leviathan mainman and convicted domestic abuser Jeff Whitehead (a.k.a. Wrest) is being evicted from the Portland Oregon warehouse he maintained as a storefront for his Devout Rcrds label/record store and the “anarchist print shop” Eberhardt Printsop. Whitehead is the victim of allegedly evil capitalist landlords who want to commit the horrible act of leasing their hard earned property at market price, which happens to be double that of what Wrest can afford. Therefore, Wrest has tapped his neo-communist friend Neil Jameson (who is publicly living out a similar midlife crisis) to help beg for moneytarget=”_blank” rel=”nofollow external” from “the miserable collective workforce” a.k.a. you, the consumers.  Yes, you have read correctly- Wrest is so desperate to save a commercial “Anarchist clothing line” from having its free-market commerce shut down by other free market commerce that he has stooped to digital panhandling.target=”_blank” rel=”nofollow external”
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Whiny Leaf Metal Singer Disparages American Workers

Ivor Whitten, the useless vocalist of the D-grade Canadian thrash metal band Anvil, complained in a recently published radio interviewtarget=”_blank” rel=”nofollow external” about how American workers are lazy and would all take welfare if they could. As many of us know, Ivor and Anvil’s entie legacy is their depressing but well marketed documentary on how being in a metal band is hard and they don’t have any money to go to the Asian sushi place near Niagra Falls after 20 years of playing generic thrash metal that was never good. Obviously triggered by the bored response the band receives at their American shows along with the tragic realization that he and his fellow musicians only were able to make money by getting people to feel sorry for them upon seeing their pathetic life story, Ivor foolishly proclaimed:target=”_blank” rel=”nofollow external”

From my personal experience, in America, it’s pretty much taken for granted and people kind of look at it like, ‘So what?’ Because people in that country, generally speaking, are lazy, and if they can go on welfare, they will. They don’t have work ethics. So how could they relate to a story about somebody who keeps trying and being faced with adversities and failures?”

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INDIVIDUALISM KILLS CHILDREN (NOT GUNS)

Welp, another school shooting is in the books, and this means we begin the cycle of another nationwide emotional meltdown of reactionary liberals over a founding pillar of our “evil” American culture.  Since metal heads and metal journalists everywhere are weighing in on this, and since most (all?) of them are too dumb to say anything logical or researched, it once again has fallen on the staff of DMU to be the sole voice of high-IQ reason in the metal world.  For despite guns being legal in America for over 200 years (with over 200 being free of school shootings), despite automatics/machine guns being loose on the streets since at least the 1920s (with 70 of those years being free of school shootings), and despite gun ownership being in steep decline the last few decades (despite school shootings being on the rise), liberals everywhere continue to fall for the totalitarian “give up the gun” scam and blame our second amendment for the mass murder of innocent children.  While stats clearly prove otherwise, many miss the true root of this tragedy: the individualism our society has been embracing since the cultural revolution of the 1960s.

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The Importance of the Hessian Ideal

The modern way of life has conditioned people to think and consider their lives a juxtaposition of ‘job’, ‘family’ and ‘hobbies’ along with ‘fun’. This is a model influenced by industrial mentality, which needs vast amount of automatons performing meaningless tasks for the sake of production itself, simply in order to protect the bottom line at the expense of individual quality and relevance. As a result, very few people, indeed an incredibly outnumbered minority, will see and live their job as a craft wherein they find aesthetic and spiritual meaning, and would rather be out the door as soon as possible as long as their salaries are not affected.

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The Haarslev PB30/60 As Big As The Ritz

Dennis Emmental hated being late because it revealed to everyone how little he wanted to be there. Slipping past the creaky back door, he took his place in the line at OptiFood. Orders came from the digital kiosk at the drive-thru and Dennis had twenty-four seconds to assemble the ingredients for the OptiMeal:

  • Chinese: steak|chicken|fish, Szechuan sauce, noodles, lettuce, pepper, peanuts, onion
  • Mexican: beef|chicken, cheese 1, Picante sauce, lettuce, pepper, Guacamole sauce, sour cream
  • Italian: beef|chicken, Diable sauce, noodles, pepper, lettuce, onion, cheese 2
  • Thai: beef|chicken, cheese 1, noodles, Picante sauce, Szechuan sauce, pepper, onion
  • Murican: beef|chicken, cheese 2, Diable sauce, bread 11, Gaucamole sauce, cheese 1, lettuce
  • European: steak|chicken|fish, lettuce, pepper, sour cream, cheese 2, onion, bread 11

He and his cohorts were dumping ingredients in the short, stout, beaker-shaped commemorative plastic buckets used to serve the twenty-four ounce meals. The store was open twenty-four hours a day, and had a thirty-eight percent turnover rate at a six month interval. The owners were unconcerned; they had reached the point where it took a million bucks just to think about suing them, and everyone knew that most of their employees were retards and flakes and so just laughed off their complaints.

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Trendkillers #1- Death to List Culture!

Trendkillers #1- Death to List Culture!

 

In Trendkillers, we will engage the unseen and/or uncontested trends that have permeated metal culture.  Death to false idols! 

 

We begin the Trendkillers series with the most tired and meaningless year end tradition in metal culture- the top 10 list.  Or is it a top 20, top 40, top 100 list?  Do 100 death metal albums even get released in a year, or are some blogs trying to virtue-signal how many albums they are aware of? In any case, many metal bands and musicians consider this the crown jewel of their existence as it’s often the only chance they get to pad their narcissism and reaffirm their perceived importance in the grand scheme of things.

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