Our first round of Death Metal Underground tshirts have arrived and can be yours within only a few days. Thanks to Cliff Kemple and the team at T.C. West Graphics, these tshirts are pro-printed Port & Co. “Core Blend” 50% cotton/50% polyester tshirts with the Death Metal Underground logo on the front and an inspirational message on the back.
To order one of these fine dystopian apocalypse eveningwear classics, either send $20 to firstname.lastname@example.org or use the buy it now button above (CONUSA orders only, for now). All are size XL to fit giant Viking metalheads. We ship first class in sturdy packaging that is totally not discrete so your neighbors know that you worship Satan, Darwin and Nietzsche on the altar of the music of the undead ancients, or words to that effect. This first batch is not huge, so if you want one, speak up sooner rather than later!
I saw Mayhem play De Mysteriis Dom Sathanas, the only album of theirs that actually counts of course, last week at the Howard Theater in Washington, DC so I wanted to tell my fellow Death Metal Underground readers what’s happening inside the ANUS of this tour. That was surely an ironic choice of venue the band made there. Playing a black theater in a historically black city was strange for a band whose drummer, Hellhammer, is a badass drummer who hits like a fucking beast like a German in a tank trying to conquer Africa back from his historic racial enemies, the Polish and the Africans and Hellhammer is Greek or something so how can these losers with nothing better to do claim he’s even racist you know? Also practicing under their swastika banners and shit like that they shouldve brought out to steam roll all the drunk hipsters instead of comic book covers to hide behind onstage. I had to check this shit out to see if some shit would go down. I wanted to see if the gig would rule or if any crazy shit from hipsters, communists, or any other idiot life forms that could come out of a UFO or something would be real you know and prevent Mayhem from pounding my face in you know.
New Zealand war metal band Heresiarch announced their upcoming record, Death Ordinance, on their Facebook page. The artwork is by Misanthropic-Art and the album will be released by Dark Descent Records later this year. Heresiarch’s prior releases, Hammer of Intransigence and Waelwulf, were noted as some of The Best Underground Metal Releases of 2011 and 2014 respectively.
Nu-“metal” (really rap rock) bands Korn and Slipknot were banned by an American military captain heading a command post according to a Department of Defense memo posted to Twitter by a United States Marine. Also forbidden from being played at all hours were late 90s and early 2000s butt rock bands Smashmouth, Nickelback, and Creed. The reason for the officer banning the playing of the groups’ music in totality was that they were “terrible.” Hopefully this officer has his wits about him and bans metalcore and hipster whine rock if whichever imbecile was playing rap rock moves onto other styles of “terrible” rock music.
Former Morbid bassist Dr. Schitz was interviewed by metal webzine Bardo Methodology. Dr. Schitz, a working psychologist in Sweden, tells what drove his bandmate Dead from Mayhem, Dead’s Cotard’s Delusion, and why H.P. Lovecraft’s Cthulhu mythos along with the related Simon Necronomicon from the 1970s (used for lyrical inspiration by Morbid Angel) was so influential to non-English speaking metal lyrics and themes. Check it out.
The Southern Poverty Law Center’s Hatewatch feed and Mic Media claim milk is “a new, creamy symbol of white racial purity in Donald Trump’s America”. Yes as a white man with orange skin is president, cow’s milk is racist even though European, African, Middle Eastern, and Indian populations are all lactose tolerant. Cheese and yogurt sauce anyone?