Lord
Behind the Curtain of Darkness
[Eldethorn]


Garbage. Complete garbage. That basically sums up this album. It's hard to believe, but this is easily one of the worst records I've heard in a long time, only to be topped by the immense heap of shit known as Candle Serenade. In fact, Lord sucks in the same way that makes Candle Serenade such an agonizingly annoying band to listen to. For those that think that France is the epitome of homosexuality, here's your album.

Pretty much everything about this record is amazingly lame. The riffs are composed of simple, straight bar chords that meander through ridiculously silly sounding progressions. The drums are played with the imagination of a retarded 3-year old (in other words, annoying simple beats that your grandmother could probably produce). The vocals are decent, but every so often the band chooses to throw in some horrid off-key clean vox. To top it off, there's some synth work, but it in no way adds any degree of interest or talent to this record. These people are musical idiots, and not one song on the album is decent or actually goes anywhere. Upon hearing the music, I've developed the theory that the members of Lord have quite a few extra chromosomes, if you know what I mean.

Honestly, I don't know how this band got signed, but I assume it has something to do with Neat Records (Eldethorn is just a side label) wanting to cash in on black metal. I luckily got this for free, and I would be quite pissed if I had paid for it. "Behind the Curtain of Darkness" gave myself and some friends something to laugh at for about 10 minutes before it just became irritating. This disc is incredibly stupid, and if you actually enjoy this, perhaps you should look into joining a local gay/lesbian group. It sounds like something they'd probably play at a meeting, so take it with you and be a hit with all your fag friends.


1998 baalberith