Thinking about death.

[Ratatosk]

Transcix what you're saying sounds a lot like some matrix talk. shit, diving into the vortex is going to make me even stranger than i am now, as one of the things i realized in the abyss of pondering death is the relativity of all absurdity depending on the accompanying circumstances. It's liberating to know this, but it also makes me feel as though i am one of the only people that know this. the only place where people give it any thought is in art, this is where anything truly human comes alive but it's limited to that domain like a small box inside the bigger box of human concsiousness. It's hard to even express thoughts coherently anymore. My mind takes me from the most terrifying thoughts to complete emptiness like a pendulum on drugs. basically i feel like this guy - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cud_k9f6tqk
I've read up on the allegory of the cave and it seems as though i am sort of leaving a life of illusory shadows..and it's painful as hell. only i dont' know if what i'll enter will be another cave of illusions, or a realm of clarity, all i know is that i had to abandon the cave i was in. it may have been comfortable and predictable but that's not truth.. the first two decades of my life were completely worthless, knowing what i know now, but most people would consider the path i'm taking now a completely pointless waste of life

Diesel,

I do want you to know that you are not fully alone in this journey, although the particulars may vary. Myself and one other have been where you are, and our conclusions have been so different that I will not share too many details lest yours becomes corrupted. Absurdity, yes. It is possible that you may have something inside of you that you can distill to great purpose. If not, you can open yourself up to the void where many cannot. Any of these things may ultimately be good or bad for your health or sanity, but is is a good idea to keep an eye on these things in small ways every day.

[Roman Legion 666]

Well, I had to start a new account due to my old computer crashing and I had lost my password.

At any rate, for me personally I have seen death and have almost died. I believe this gives you a perspective, that not being close to death, can bring.

Also the one true aspect of death is not knowing what lies after. I am sure this topic can rage on for centuries, and even the tough guys after think to themselves, that when you die, what is there?

I did not scan this post like I should have, but I automatically knew that I had experience with this subject. This year, three months ago, I lost both grandparents in two weeks. I was ready and happy for their peaceful slumber.

In closing, death is "scary" because the thought of losing what you know can be numbing, but at the same time, I await death with open arms in excitement to found out. If there is nothingness, then I am already there!

[indjaseemun]

Death throws in your face everything that you've done but 10x worse. Hell is not a myth, it is a post-life reality. You did not think it would be that easy, did you? Of course nothing goes unpunished. If you do not make it all right now, you're fucked for life... or better yet, for after-life.