Shy people often idolize role models
, and I was no different. The problem is that the chronically shy seem to idolize even themselves. I said that just for effect. The problem is that they seem to idolize everyone in society, rudely leaving behind people who they happen to have the luck to be stronger or more better looking than.
Sometimes we tell our parents how ashamed we are of some public situation, and they say to let go, and that person x isn't that important for us to think so much about them and about what they think or may say about us, and that they probably have their problems too.
Depending on the person, maybe we will like this advice but in some cases it will be intolerable: It's PERSON X we're talking about.
Maybe what your parent is trying to say is that she/he HIMSELF did something stupid and totally humiliating, or allowed it to be done to them, and in all those years of experience lived is not allowing the possibility that PERSON X was never in those situations too, because damn it, he's no better than me and my family. And maybe he/she is right! And knowing that person x has been in those situations, similar, as much as, or more embarassing than we ourselves have, is liberating.
And people who happen to project their parents onto others, if this indeed happens, can enjoy this too.