Does anyone else not like to poop in public restrooms?
I don't like it at all. They tend to be grubby places, germy and gross. What is that brown liquid, on the floor, coffee or... oh god no. They are not very private. People come in and look at your shoes and they're like "Oh hi Addison, you're taking a huge crap. Tell me all about it." People also judge you on the smell of your excrement. You'll hear people make comments like too much broccoli or this guy eats a lot of pork.
Today however myself and Del Taco brought to my workplace a spectacular poop. If it were a fish, it would a prize catch. I could see bits of red pepper in it. I brought a book and read it while I polluted the air. I hear people groan as they opened the door and caught a whiff. When I was done, I wish they had a scale in the toilet because I swear I took the biggest poop of anyone here today.
The only down side is that I can't tell anyone about it. Must have been 2kg if it was an ounce.