100% Metal Forum (Death Metal and Black Metal)

Metal => Metal => Topic started by: death metal black metal on March 05, 2005, 08:22:02 AM

Title: Metallica
Post by: death metal black metal on March 05, 2005, 08:22:02 AM
Last August I got a chance to see Metallica at an outdoor festival. But it gets kinkier. I was also working at the time for a drug dealer, because as a transvestite I can make deliveries without too much hassle since most people find me creepy anyway. They tend to back towards a wall whenever I show up. But this drug dealer told me I had to work that night. "Aw..." I said.

I was only 22, and fresh out of the suburbs. My tight white-Latino ass had not been punctured yet the way I wanted it to be and the way I hoped someday a strong man like James Hetfield might. My dealer was a corrupt Frenchman with a constant raging hardon, but he wasn't my type. Still he knew what he wanted and took it.

So on the night of the show I am wearing a red dress with a ninja star broach. My legs are shaved and I am recently washed with my makeup looking good. A place full of teenage hormones checking me out as a woman. It just about made me erect under the tape. I had 2 oz of cocaine and some extras for the guys in Metallica. They were supposed to find me by my broach. Finally a security guy led me backstage...

"What can we do for ya, lady?" said a resonably intoxicated James Hetfield as I walked into the room. In my best falsetto I said, "I am here bringing office supplies," looking around, wondering if they knew. "Yeah right, lady," said Lars with emphasis on the last two syllables. Before I knew it he had whipped my wig off, and torn open my dress.

"Of all silliness..." said James but then his eyes widened when I tossed him the giant package. "Well, I can understand that, anyway,"
he said. "Why're you dressed up like a girl?"

I couldn't say anything. Paralyzed with fear.

Finally Lars said, "Because he's a faggot."

"That's it," I said.

Lars fucking grabbed me again and I thought he was going to bite me but instead he was deep tonguing me, while Kirk and Jason unpeeled the rest of my dress and licked my mancherry ring. I could hear James getting lubed up in the background, and sighed as Lars grabbed my throbbing cock. He handed it to Kirk who began palming it while wearing a creepy trenchcoat like all the guys hanging out near the boy's locker room at the YMCA. Lars forced me to my knees, and shoved his earnest 4" manhood into my waiting mouth.

I gulped and slurped while a painful ramming from behind let me knowthat Jason was trying my ass with some guacamole for lubricant.

"URRRGGGHHH!!!" I moaned as Lars fired his searing milk into my throat, gagging on the salty congealing mucus. At the same time Jason suddenly squealed and from the strange pressure in my ass I realized he was filling it. My 7" member fully erect, I was getting mouthed by Kirk who had a bag of candy and a Tickle Me Elmo doll also. Jason collapsed into a corner.

Now I thought, maybe it's my turn on the sweet round ass of Lars, but instead I was roughly turned about and flung over a couch as a massive 9" erect James Hetfield strode over to me. "Boy, you ARE going to be a woman when I am through." It was the most painful anal battering of my life, but I could not stop shrieking my delight as he probed far into my inmost essence.

They had to go play a show after that so I hung out and took PCP with their trained dwarf gimp until they got sick of the crowd and came back to the hotel room. In a fog of drugs and alcohol, I got fucked by Lars and Jaymz all night long, satisfied Newstead twice and got free UnderRoos(tm) from Kirk. I couldn't believe how long my ass bled the next day but it's a night I never will forget!!

Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: Big Cock Beelzebub on March 05, 2005, 10:03:57 AM
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: Frank_the_Tank on March 06, 2005, 09:05:47 AM
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: Razor on March 06, 2005, 12:16:27 PM
I'm speechless.
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: DARKTROLL on August 16, 2005, 05:54:13 AM
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: Araya on August 16, 2005, 11:02:36 AM
I cannot believe that there is someone out there who lacks a life more than myself.   ::)
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: NihilisticNoise on August 17, 2005, 08:00:59 AM
Lars's 4" cock lol
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: mayhem-kin on September 22, 2005, 10:19:38 PM
what the fuck
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: Tyron on September 23, 2005, 04:07:39 PM
thats not real is it? :o
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: Niko on October 06, 2005, 06:52:03 AM


Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: Voice_Of_Treason on October 07, 2005, 04:15:46 AM
You dont actually believe any of that bullshit do you?

Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: Megidolan on November 11, 2005, 10:59:52 AM
Lol some ppl have to much free time
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: Annihilaytorr on November 16, 2005, 04:44:27 PM
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: tedmarley on November 20, 2005, 11:14:19 AM
metallica have gone so shit now there older albums was ok but now there sould just called it a day
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: Abaddon on November 25, 2005, 07:14:52 PM
... well now that I vmonited my dinner and returned my 'Kill 'em all' cd, I think I just might survive, though the extent which my cock n' balls have submerged themselves into a combination of fear and utter limpness is very impressive.

If I want to restrain myself from raping someone, I'll be sure and read that.  :D
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: death metal black metal on November 29, 2005, 01:46:42 PM
METALLICA (http://www.anus.com/etc/metallica/)

Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: Blackened_whitey on January 11, 2006, 06:25:18 PM
Actually I thought it was a joke until I saw this...


why do you blame them? after all they're only livin' la vida loca.... YEAH BABY!!!!!!!!!!!

Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: on September 15, 2007, 04:14:16 AM
Irrelevant. Metallica cultivated their largely transvestite/transexual fanbase in the years immediately after the  Load and ReLoad albums. The events described here probably occurred at any one of their shows between 1996 and 2001.
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: GreatBlackJoy on September 15, 2007, 10:05:42 AM
That's gotta be written by the same arch-troll who wrote that Steve Jobs Macintosh fag orgy thing (http://www.anus.com/etc/apple/).
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: Humanicide on September 16, 2007, 03:44:45 AM
Somehow im not suprised.
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: death metal black metal on September 18, 2007, 01:42:31 PM
As soon as it echos out of my speakers I can almost smell his tasty asshole.

As soon as it flatulates out of my speakers, I can almost taste his smelly asshole. Del-i-ci-ous.

I wish metal were coming out with stuff as good as "And Justice for All," minus the rock beats and jump riffs. The melodic composition on that album is fantastic, for any mainstream rock including the vaunted 1960s hippiefest.
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: NEVR4GETLOL on September 19, 2007, 02:55:32 AM
I think ...And Justice For All is awesome. What are the examples for rock beats and jump riffs and what makes them bad?
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: nAMELESShERETIC on September 21, 2007, 11:50:41 AM
I thought Cliff Burton was alright. They had him murdered, you all know that right?
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: born for banning on September 22, 2007, 04:25:30 AM
Could be.

Metallica was en route on a road between Stockholm and Copenhagen, to their next gig that was scheduled for September 27th, 1986. Earlier that night the band drew cards for the assignment of the bunks on the tour bus. As fate would have it, Cliff drew the ace of spades and chooses Kirk Hammett's bunk. Around dawn, the bus driver lost control of the bus and overcorrects with the steering wheel to get back on the road. The bus begins to skid out of control and rolls several times before coming to a halt. Cliff was ejected and pinned underneath. The band disembarks to find Cliff motionless. Later a crane was brought to the scene to lift up the bus, the band hoped Cliff could be saved. However, after lifting the bus up, it slipped back down. According to Mick Hughes, Metallica's sound engineer, no one was sure if Cliff was still alive at that point


A hastily planned accident after he opposed the plan for selling out? And then they lift up the bus, hear the groans, and yank the chain so it slips again, finishing the job?

Where is Jessica Fletcher (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0086765/) when you need her?
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: AttheGates1996 on September 24, 2007, 02:53:08 PM
wow, i would have never guessed that phil anselmo would be posting his fantasies on anus' metal forums
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: blood on October 11, 2007, 05:44:24 PM
lol this is my type of humor, until seeing this post i had thought death metal black metal was spinoza ray. this poster should check out 4chan if he hasnt cause i will be raping /b/ with this copypasta so hard.
Title: Re: Metallica
Post by: Mithrandir on October 11, 2007, 07:47:02 PM
lol this is my type of humor, until seeing this post i had thought death metal black metal was spinoza ray.

But it is, isn't it?