SMR: The Sound of Millenial Failure

While this year may be generous in terms of good music, it has given also given us music of such bad quality that it should be made to produce such music without compensating the listeners!

Car Bomb – “Dissect Yourself”
The song consists of simplified Suffocation breakdowns that consist of cheap video game sound effects. PEW PEW PEW annoyingly bombards the listener. The band do this a few times before introducing pathetically bad clean vocals and ending the song. The idiotic sound effects are better than anything else in this song. This should have been a stream of PEW PEW PEW and nothing else. Car Bomb know that their music is terrible and have resorted to the weakest gimmick ever seen in music. Many animals faced cruel deaths in detonating mines during the Lebanese Civil War, Car Bomb would have been better!

Tool- Fear Innoculum
All the melodies comes from their previous records but this time round, they repeat the parts a ridiculous number of times to artificially lengthen the songs. The band then add random sound effects and then use an acoustic guitar or bass to play it. The transitions are very rare as each song has no more than four ideas across songs that are over the ten minute mark. There are no more than three non offensive riffs throughout the whole record and they are just catchy Rock riffs without much meaning. Some of the sections include palm muted chugs that last for a few minutes, vocal effects, ambient sounds and other inane tricks. This is the worst album of the year by far and is symptomatic of what is problematic with modern music. اقتل هؤلاء الكفار على جرائمهم ضد الموسيقى

FuneralMortem “Opening the Eye of Leviathan”
A young band completely enamored with Sacramentum and Dissection that follows the aesthetic in both performance and execution thoroughly. The melodic choruses, acoustic guitars, streams of tremolo picked riffs and the spoken word parts. Even the outline of the arrangements are followed but the issue is that this song communicates nothing and is just an interpretation of a specific style. What FuneralMortem need to do is to take those techniques and not limit themselves to this niche style while at the same time finding their own voice and expressing something of value. A good start for a demo and the only listenable song here but it will take a lot more to create convincing music.

Bloody Sadism – Eloquent Atrocity
The standard samples and the same mind numbing repetitive that exists in all the bands of this style. The pig squeals and vacuum cleaner vocals are not even a joke but just a sad statement for a genre that wanted to be the most vile artform possible but ended up like a joke that has been going for far too long. Bloody Sadism sound closer to Dance music than actual metal and should either make good Death metal or stop playing.

Sabaton “Bismarck”
The missing link between metal and The Village People has finally been found!

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23 thoughts on “SMR: The Sound of Millenial Failure”

  1. Flying Kites says:

    Possibly two-thirds of village people gay.

    “Biker was straight; cop, cowboy, Indian, sailor – all gay; construction workier -nonofy our beeswax (his response, not mine)”

    https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090205233644AAQM2Dj&guc&guccounter=1

  2. Psychic Psych Toad says:

    Is the new Tool worse than the new Korn and Slipknot albums?

      1. Psychic Psych Toad says:

        They MUST be better just by default…

  3. Billy Foss says:

    What do y’all think of Necrowretch?

  4. Ron Burgundy and Tits McGee says:

    Car Bomb – “Dissect Yourself” had me laughing when the video game effect sounds popped in.
    I know it is a really stupid song, but I like it!
    It would probably fit in well with some generic TV show or movie where the child or teen is acting crazy in his bedroom, and doing what else?
    Playing X-Box and yelling into his headset at the people he is killing on-screen, lol.

  5. Acacia Strain Hoodie says:

    ALWAYS SADISTIC, NEVER HOLISTIC

    1. SODOMIZE
      THE WEAK

  6. Lee says:

    Can anyone give me a list of the best albums of the year so far?

    1. mash the nuke button says:

      Devourment – New Devourment Album

      otherwise everything’s mostly garbage and AIDS

      1. CLOWN WORLD 2019 A.D.:

        Everything is mostly garbage and AIDS.

        Amongst the ruins, one man struggles for a quest… a purpose… meaning.

        And most of all, not to have a nu-metal soundtrack.

        1. Psychic Psych Toad says:

          If only all music had Ross Robinson’s magic touch! A little Fred Durst first thing in the morning never hurt anybody!

          All I wanted was a Pepsi.

          1. A repo man is always intense.

    2. Psychic Psych Toad says:

      1. Tool
      2. Korn
      3. Slipknot
      4. Everything that DMU says is better.

      1. maelstrrom says:

        You forgot the new Opeth album

        1. doomin' hesh trance says:

          check the new konkhra lol

        2. They use it in laboratories to give rats AIDS in order to test new medications upon them.

    3. The Dismembered One says:

      Mefitis’ Emberdawn and Polemicist’s Zarathustrian are the only ones that came to mind.

    4. frozenlake says:

      Ceremony of Silence // Outis
      Esoctrilihum // The telluric ashes of the ö north immemorial Gods
      Creature // Contes Funèbres
      Vous Autres // Champ du Sang
      Lingua Ignota // Caligula
      Weeping Sores // False Confession
      Sammath // Acros the Rhine is only Death
      Vessel of Iniquity // Void of Infinite Horror
      Poil // Sus
      Cloud Rat // Pollinator
      Fawn Limbs // Harm Remissions
      Polemicist // Zarathustrian Impressions
      Nothingness // The Hollow Gaze of Death
      Vananidr // Road North
      Lurid Panacea // The Insidious Poisons
      Verwoed // De Val
      Sunn 0))) // Life Metal
      Mefitis // Emberdawn
      Mylingar // Döda Själar
      Yellow Eyes // Rare Field Ceiling

    5. Cynical says:

      Ultra Silvam — The Spearwound Salvation
      Imprecation — Damnatio ad Bestias
      Profanatica — Rotting Incarnation of God
      Takafumi Matsubara — Strange, Beautiful, and Fast
      Baptized by Fire — Upon the Pyre
      Cemetarian — Tomb of Morbid Stench
      Suhnopfer — Hic Regnant Borbonii Manes
      Mefitis — Emberdawn
      Varathron — Duality of the Unholy Existence (ignore the Rotting Christ side)

      Greatly looking forward to the new Cianide and Oath of Cruelty. New Havohej should also be interesting.

      1. Did Rotting Christ D.O.A. (die of AIDS)?

        1. Cynical says:

          Rumors of Rotting Christ “returning to form” in the last few years are greatly exaggerated. I still can’t find a reason to listen to anything by them after “Non Serviam”.

      2. I hope you live says:

        Hateful Meditations borthher

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