Death Metal Underground’s staff makes great personal sacrifice to ensure that we degrade the unworthy, the inferior, and the charming. We show no mercy and will defile your corpse.
6 CommentsTags: black light, chronic hangover, crap, death worship, diablerie, dreaming dead, et moriemur, kladovest, miserist, mosaic, neoheresy, sadistic metal reviews, slamophiliac, stonegazer, theosophy, törkyraato
Blood must be shed to atone for the sins of these mostly horrific recordings. Every single person who thought releasing these was a great idea should attempt to give themselves a self-swirlie while under the influence. Banging their head on the porcelain toilet tank lid will knock some sense into them or crack their skulls open. Hopefully the latter.
35 CommentsTags: acod, AIDS, beer metal, black 'n roll, carpatus, ctulu, cvinger, deathcore, ethmebb, hyperion, kforkill, krampus, maldoror, mustan kuun lapset, nyktophobia, orwellian, quintessenz, raise the black, sadistic metal reviews, sail, servus, starlit woods, viles vitae, wormhole
Will every single one of these bands eventually get AIDS? Let’s find out!
4 CommentsTags: AIDS, aksaya, Ambient, black 'n roll, Black Metal, comatose, conceived by hate, death 'n' roll, death metal, drone, emo, haxxan, hereza, inexorable, insanity cult, Lorn, morbid messiah, sadistic metal reviews, screamo, todesstoss, tome of the unreplenished, ur
Some bands have promise; these have veered off the road and are currently charring in a gasoline fire. Will they crawl out? Let’s find out!
44 CommentsTags: Ascended Dead, barrow wight, beer metal, black 'n roll, black magick ss, chain, eternity's end, hetroertzen, hipster bullshit, nan elmoth, pop, sacrificial massacre, sadistic metal reviews, trends mosh core fun, tuman, tymah, Туман
Old Disgruntled Bastard, one of the few quality metal blogs around, accused Death Metal Underground of writing clickbait on Facebook for our recent Sadistic Metal Reviews of older albums our staff had noticed to be inferior to the best of the past:
118 CommentsTo Death Metal Underground: Certain albums have endured – for musical and extra-musical reasons – across decades and among generations of metalheads of diverse backgrounds, and the least they warrant is treatment with the respect they’ve earned. There is no revelation to be made and there is no current of general perception to be reversed by “raping sacred favorites”. Clickbait is distinctly unelitist and pissing in the wind for the fuck of it isn’t terribly smart either.
Tags: Angel Witch, blood, classics, clickbait, cynic, dissection, diversity, gothenburg metal, kreator, manilla road, nostalgia, Old Disgruntled Bastard, sadistic metal reviews, salt, sentimentality, sodom, sodomize the weak
Tags: aethyr, arkhaeon, battle beast, blaine rohmer, boring, coldborn, crurifragium, Cryptic Realms, diktatur, doom's day, durr metal, evil priest, gloson, grimmd, hessaja, ic rex, idiots, kratornas, lacerated and carbonized, maloic, maze of sothoth, messaja, metalcore, mordant, nephilim, Ónefnt, Óreiða, ride for revenge, sadistic metal reviews, season of arrows, self-hatred, swine soul, teramobil, the descent, the flight of sleipnir, tomb mold, tygers of pan tang, ulalatum tollunt, wrath of echoes
These bands attempt to masquerade their GarageBand music fit only for arcades, pizza parlors, and high school dances as underground metal. They fail.
22 CommentsTags: agonia, anasarca, aversions crown, chalice of suffering, diablerie, dischordia, duch czerni, durr metal, herem, hostage of fate, lux ferre, moontower, murkocet, pessimist, sadistic metal reviews, scalpture, snogg, spitefuel, sturmtiger, tenebrae in perpetuum, violblast, vultur, witchery, wolfshowl
These random, gimped releases are held in high regard by high-pitched “metal” critics and core pogo stickers. The Death Metal Underground staff takes it upon themselves to scorn and defile them in the name of all that is good in the metal genre.
28 CommentsTags: amon amarth, cynic, deathcore, dripping, fags, homosexuality, in flames, jazz fusion, lykathea aflame, melodeaf, metalcore, nu-metal, random, sadistic metal reviews, slam, techdeaf, tek-deth
The Death Metal Underground staff subjects themselves to countless nights of toilet diving in order to bring you gems crapped out by the dessicated undead corpse of the music industry. These are what we left in the latrine.
15 CommentsTags: AIDS, black 'n roll, crustcore, d-beat, dimension terror, endalok, evenline, extermination angel, fall of carthage, fraser edwards, imha tarikat, immolation, liturgy of decay, martyrdöd, metalcore, sadistic metal reviews, second horizon, shit, Speed Metal, suicide, trauer, War Metal
George Psalmanazar submitted a few reviews of albums he vehemently despises to Death Metal Underground. Enjoy!
39 CommentsTags: amon amarth, Angel Witch, arena rock, bedshitting, dissection, glam metal, glam rock, hard rock, Heavy Metal, judas priest, manilla road, NWOBHM, pop music, sadistic metal reviews, sell-out, stadium metal, stadium rock
