The Musician’s Guide to SJW Values

Metal, like punk, once a lawless wild west where no attitude or ideology was unwelcome or too extreme.  But after hipsters unifed the masses of 90’s counter cultures into one mainstream culture, a far left ideology was adopted by and heavily policed within nearly every sub/counter cultural music genre (metal included).  Despite this being the exact opposite of what metal has been about for many decades, the desperation to fit in has left many of the aging neckbeard social outcast fake metalheads to adopt this heinous bastardization of music’s most honest genre and collectively enforce these new mainstream social rules.  And just like in the mainstream culture of today, breaking any of these rules (or having broken them in the past before these social norms were instituted) is designated with a swift lifetime band from showing yourself in public in the U.S.

Lately, a lot of metal bands have  been getting in trouble for doing things that progressive liberal culture finds unacceptable.  Many bands have been confused by the rules, as progressive liberal logic is absolutely nonsensical,  and therefore musicians struggle with the details behind this new social paradigm.  Having fought the left in our culture war for several years now and being often confronted with these nutcases, I determined it would be in the best interest of metal’s very badass musicians understand what crimes and behaviors are okay.  Please find below, a very thoroughly researched look into the disturbed mind of Social Justice Warriors:

Chart 1: Individual’s Morality

Crime/Behavior                                                                                  Acceptable?

MURDER                                                                                                      YES

ASSAULT (MALE VICTIM)                                                                      YES

ASSAULT (FEMALE VICTIM)                                                                 NO (Unless you’re signed to Profound Lore)

THEFT                                                                                                           YES

BESTIALITY                                                                                                 YES

PEDOPHILIA                                                                                               NO (Unless you write for MetalSucks)

GRAVE ROBBERY                                                                                      YES

SAYING MEAN THINGS ABOUT MEN                                                 YES

SAYING MEAN THINGS ABOUT WOMEN                                         NO (Unless you write for MetalSucks)

SAYING MEAN THINGS ABOUT WHITES                                          YES

SAYING MEAN THINGS ABOUT ANY OTHER RACE                     NO (Unless you’re signed to Profound Lore)

SAYING MEAN THINGS ABOUT CHRISTIANS                                 YES


SAYING MEAN THINGS ABOUT LGTBTQ                                          NO


Chart 2: Lyrical  Themes

By Religion:                                                      Acceptable?

ANTI-CHRISTIAN                                                YES

ANTI-JEWISH                                                       NO

ANTI-ISLAM                                                          NO

ANTI-ANY OTHER RELIGION                         NO

By Race:                                                             Acceptable?

RACISM AGAINST WHITES                             YES

RACISM AGAINST BLACKS                              NO

RACISM AGAINST ASIANS                               YES


By Gender:                                                       Acceptable?

ANTI-MALE                                                           YES

ANTI-FEMALE                                                      NO

ANTI-LGBTQ                                                         NO


Amazingly, research indicates that both the most popular SJW metal site and the bands signed to the most popular SJW record label have broken most of the SJW rules.  But since both are (within their niches) very popular, and the need to fit in is rampant amongst social justice warriors, nobody will question either one.  It’s also pretty random which religions and races are okay to have critical lyrical themes against.  If there is any doubt that liberalism, leftism, and social justice warrior culture is absolute nonsense, look no further than this social paradigm.  And if you really think you’re a progressive, you might want to start holding MetalSucks and Profound Lore Records accountable.


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11 thoughts on “The Musician’s Guide to SJW Values”

  1. ghjkl; says:

    All progressive moral pageantry really just boils down to advertising your class. “I’m a good little urbane upper-middle class white person whose opinions fall within the Acceptable range in our postmodern zeitgeist. I’m not one of those icky gross rural poor people. Accept me.”00

    It’s the same reason metal-archives normies find Arghoslent, Burzum and Death in June acceptable (“… mind you, I’m TOTALLY not racist myself…”) but find right head skinhead bands to be just TOO problematic and racist. The former is music for bourgie sensibilities, the latter is music for working class sensibilities. There’s no actual loyalty to ideals going on here, it’s social positioning.

    In the memeplex, Krieg and Leviathan are Good Little Upper-Middle-Class Artsy Bands first and Bad People second. That might change if enough hack journalists decide to churn out some hitpieces, but it’s all fake, it’s all a scramble to secure a nice spot in the pecking order.

    1. ghjkl; says:

      *right wing, rather

    2. Coolest Monkey In The Jungle says:

      Well said. However, the cognitive dissonance can become too much in the fragile mind of the SJW, and they end up snapping their Arghoslent CDs in half and writing emotional updates about the experience on the internet (I seriously remember a militant homosexual doing that several years ago).

      But indeed they won’t touch anything heavily “neopagan” or “Nazi”, like Absurd or Thor’s Hammer etc.. even Skrewdriver’s first album is off limits (before they became “waaaaysist”) or David Allen Coe for that matter. But they’ve got no problem with NWA, Public Enemy, Wu Tang, as to police black people’s language would be white privilege or something. Unless they’re bashing gays.. how does that progressive stack work again?

      Talking of which, ever noticed how Thor is depicted as an oafish buffoon in Marvel’s shitty new movies (and he needs women/blacks/SJWs to rescue him) whereas the Black Panther is a super serious, legit saviour of (black) peoplekind – again you can’t make fun of black civilization or culture. But apparently Asgard was full of blacks and asians. Luckily, i didn’t pay a penny to watch this crap.

  2. Joe says:

    Promoting the artistic integrity of metal by….. fuck it I’m bored. MUH 4CHAN!!

  3. how i learned to stop worrying and love cuckholdry says:

    Brock, Brock, Brock… you are clearly not drinking the Koolaid. No wonder this is all so confusing for you. Chart 1 fails to account for power and privilege of the person committing the act, which is highly problematic. Chart 2, you list Islam as a religion, but that is considered a Race now; again this is highly problematic. In Chart 2, you used the antiquated terms male/Female, which refer to biological sex. Since gamete production cannot be changed with surgery, it is problematic to refer to sex instead of gender.

    You may have noticed that I’ve said “problematic” three times now, which means my hair color has actually changed from blue to red as a warning sign that I have been triggered. I am white cis-gendered man scum, but that does not stop me from being offended on behalf of every single Woman, Muslim, and LGBTQRSTUVWXYZ+ person on the planet.

    Here, take a sip of Koolaid from my “white male tears” mug so you can become woke AF. Now, start with the premise that the system is broken because it is so incredibly racist and sexist; this will be the jumping off point for our circular logic. Good, now take another sip. We will now look at some statistics, but it is important to remember that correlation DOES equal causation here, because we already know that the only possible causes for inequalities of outcome are racism and sexism. Here, take another sip, because we also want to do some serious cherry-picking with the data. We also want skin color and gender to exclusively define our demographics, because personality traits like intelligence, risk-taking, and motivation have nothing to do with success; the system is only ever racist and sexist. Keep sipping and also remember these demographics are completely homogeneous in their thinking, like various shades of Borg.

    Had enough Koolaid? Do you see yet that because most CEOs are white males, that all white men must hold the institutional power? Don’t you see that literally the only way to offset the horrible racism and sexism of the system is to become racist and sexist in the opposite direction? Perhaps if you still don’t get it, you should spend a few years of your time and tens of thousands of dollars for a college education; then you would be invested in believing…

    Sorry to mansplain (I should have let a woman of color type this for me), but I hope this clears everything up for you!

    1. I am the wack blizzards says:

      Steven Crowder pls go

  4. Ultra Boris says:

    Please do a TRANSMETAL review !!

    Please do a TRANSMETAL review !!

  5. Bestial_cumography says:

    I like how PL signs the occasional openly Nazi band (hi AMSG) but gets a pass because of whatever hipster dogshit, made by people of color, he puts out at the same time. It’s double-talk nonsense, covered by pseudo-progressive “I’m Filipino, I can’t be racist because not white,” bullshit.

    Fuck PL, 20 Cuck Spin, Gilead and every last beardo hipster wimp label that puts out this heavy plastic trash (don’t you dare call it fucking metal).

  6. DLMercury says:

    These comments are pure gold. You guys give me hope for metal being able to resist the degenerate commie/soc/sjw/lgbtqrstuvwxyz123/Tide Pod-eating crowd. Off topic – Hey Dismember – fucking reform NOW!

  7. Bill Baker says:

    I agree. Good article. Except for conflating liberalism with sjwism and progressivism and the left. Classical liberalism/original liberalism is more centrist than anything. Progressivism and Sjw-ism and the left are Marxist, Marxism is fundamentally illiberal- progressivism and sjwism are inherently illiberal.
    In fact modern cente right/conservatarians, libertarians, and so on are really the torch bearers of classical{original, ACTUAL/real} “liberalism”
    It’s like when the left conflates center right/conservatarian/classical liberal and libertartianism with neoconservatism or FAR right or the “alt right”.
    These are false equivocation fallacies, wrong conflations.

    Personally I I.D. as “Libertarian Centrist{Geolibertarian; like Thomas Paine} and/or “center right conservatarian” as well as “classical{real} liberal”

    1. Classical liberalism/original liberalism is more centrist than anything.

      I disagree. It is egalitarian in nature.

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