Wow! Now I thought that I had heard some crap before, but every now and then something comes along so incredibly bad I think it was recorded by a bunch of one-armed FAS babies holding their instruments upside-down. Nuclear Blast have somehow managed to top even themselves with this one, as Pleasures Pave Sewers is no doubt one of the most wretched and abysmal chunks of garbage released to date. With a line-up like Peter Tagtgren (Hypocrisy), Jesse Pintado and Shane Embury (Napalm Death), and Nick Barker (Cradle of Filth, Dimmu Borgir), I'm starting to think that the real goal behind this project was not to create music, but rather to amass the largest and most repulsive compound of homosexuality possible.

I guess these guys are trying to play some sort of Swedish grindcore, although the riffing here is so simplistic and boring that reaching the "generic" level would probably be a massive accomplishment. Barker's drumming is mediocre at best (of course I would expect nothing more) and Tagtgren's vocals lack energy, substance, or basically any other redeemable aspect that one can imagine. Every once in a while I think the speed has actually reached a decent level, and then, lo and behold, it suddenly slows down, because having even a mediocre element on this entire disc would be a true fucking tragedy. As if all that isn't bad enough, everyone's favorite all-too-famous label has to throw in their two cents as well by adding A) pathetic production, and B) horrible DYI packaging that makes the photo on the back practically incomprehensible.

If you're a fan of grindcore, brutal death metal, hardcore music, music in general, if you breathe air, if you're a man or a woman, or if you live on planet Earth, steer clear of this one.

© 2000 hando