Sadistic Metal Reviews: Atavism Records and the Art of Failure

Hailing from the depths of rural France and founded by a desperate middle aged obese stalker, Atavism records are a label specialized in some of the worst metal available to man. While most labels have rosters full of a variety of half baked bands with maybe one or two interesting works. Atavism records take a prideful stance in facilitating anything that sounds like angry underground metal with no quality control. Atavism records have proven to being the worst label in recent years while pushing impressionable young working class teenagers to part with their hard earned cash on this path towards involuntary celibacy, health complications and a complete lack of understanding on what makes good metal.

Funeral Desekrator – First Desekration:
Playing simple Speed metal with the blandest chord progressions possible rooted in the pentatonic scales that shift into tired early second wave tropes. This is mindless beer chugging metal with not much going on. The whole record can be divided into three main ideas that rotate constantly in simple circular arrangements for memorability. For this kind of Rock based music to work, it needs to be anthemic and catchy, this is neither and tries to remedy this by being tongue in cheek but comes across as a parody of a parody. Parisians need to steer clear from metal, their track record has been catastrophic.

359 – The Path of Ayin:
Each song consists of two ideas played in rotation for obsessively long periods of time before introducing another two similar ideas for a bit and then going back to the initial duo of riffs for a long period of time. The riffs are mediocre Darkthrone worship that probably took half a minute to write. 359 is probably more inspired by rap than metal as the music is reduced to a backing track for him to shriek over constantly. His flow is monotonous and consists of the same lazy 4/4 pattern throughout the EP and sounds tired and somewhat annoyed that that he has to wait another month for his favourite anime to be subbed. Depression, esotericism and Black metal are the new money, guns and cash.

Absolvtion – Gallow’s Destiny:
Typical Incantaclone with basic tremolo picked chromatic riffs comprised of two or three notes at a time. The band hide the monotony of such a basic tool by jumping all over the guitar neck to unleash these riffs in succession. At other times the band take the same idiotic idea and just repeat while using power chords. Occasionally there is a really good riff that comes ouf of nowhere but does nothing and vanishes fairly quickly. The breakdowns that make their appearance serve as some sort of climax but considering how random the riff salad arrangements are they don’t do anything. Archgoat for the Deathcore fan, hopefully the vocalist can find a better band to express his craft.

Dumno – Cen Atebertas:
A decent melody appears from time to time in this mess but is discarded for random droning riffs for the use of texture. The droning goes on constantly with a few variations but the songs pay no heed towards structure including very random transitions. Eventually they hit on to something decent but unlike the droning, any semblance of good music is thrown to the side for something bland. The only thing coherent here is the Hate Forest cover and that should be a sufficient to understand the kind of music on display here. An insult to the memory of flying pachyderm Dumbo.

Goatslave – Procession of Doom:
Boring power chord sequences played in the Archgoat style that are just chromatic descents or simplified Motorhead chord progressions. This is essentially dumbed down Imprecation with Inquisition and Satyricon stylings. There is one riff on the whole record that is decent and the band do well in repeating it many times. Arrangements are simple and obvious. Power chord riff, slow arpeggio passage, repeat of power chord riff, variation of power chord riff. Goatslave join honoured alumni Goatpenis in the list of bands who want to submit sexually to goats.

Saltas – Death Spirit Continuum:
Long generic Death/Doom songs that contain two or three ideas while spending ridiculous amounts of times introducing these very simplistic ideas that are stretched out to painful lengths. The melodies are obnoxious in their presence and convey nothing. Starting on the root note and holding it out before either shifting up a semitone or shifting down a semitone before adding a random note to the end of the melody. How can anyone believe that such ideas need to be slowly brought in for minutes at a time? Overall this is obviously designed for sonic wallpaper purposes but the digital tone of the guitar makes this only enjoyable for noise fans. Salt is the silent killer but Saltas is the loud sleeping pill.

Lvx Haeresis – Descensus Spiritus:
Hipster Black meets Rock and third rate Mayhem riffs in A-> B -> A arrangements. Absolutely nothing of value to be found here except for those who want to listen to a bad “Funeral Fog” cover with with a “woaah” part in the middle.

Affliction Gate – Dying Alone
Finally the least terrible band on this label. Entombed meets latter day Bolt Thrower in jumpy Hard Rock extended verse,chorus arrangements. This is bad music but compared to the rest of their roster mates it actually seems to be composed with some sense. Iron Maiden styled melodies through the Bolt Thrower arena rock filter and mindless fist raising Entombed riffs. While this is typical Wacken metal, the band do have a few good leads that would have matched well with better riffs by a band like Eucharist. The band have also proven to be smart by abandoning music completely. In the land of of the braindead, the monkey is king.

Avoid Atavism records at all cost, even if it means dying!!!

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18 thoughts on “Sadistic Metal Reviews: Atavism Records and the Art of Failure”

  1. Guillaume Martin est un homo says:

    I no this man, he is pederast look his photos. une grosse pédale.

  2. rabid dominion says:

    Known faggot and retard, he tried signing my band but I told him to fuck off or I would rape his mother. He went quiet

    1. zerowaste says:

      He’s frustrated and stupid.
      This man is a waste for metal community and for our society….

  3. maelstrrom says:

    Massacra is (was) the only great band from France

    1. Nihilism is for losers, just look in the mirror says:

      Throw in Supuration and maybe Asgard and that’s about it. I’ve heard Mütiilation and their ilk decribed as heroin elf music and that seems pretty accurate. Antaeus is proto-trianglecore.

      1. maelstrrom says:

        But those two are not pantheon-worthy

        1. fags r 4 gays says:

          u ever try reading war and peace

  4. GM says:

    He’s a waste for our society….
    His label is just bullshit,
    This man is frustrated and stupid.

  5. ignominious says:

    I prefer flying carpets to flying pachyderms.

  6. Flying Kites says:

    Parisians should practice the medieval modalities on flute or recorder in the catacombs.

    1. the gay ass French should practice medieval fellatio on skin flutes or three strings stretched across a pigs asshole (also known as the swinette) in concentration camps

    2. LostInTheANUS says:

      Parisians are niggers

  7. 666 says:

    Ha ha ha….. Bande de balais à chiottes

  8. 666 says:

    Ça respire l’intelligence par ici….

    1. Just shut down your label!

      1. Hangsv says:

        Ta gueule fils de viol

        1. calme tes ardeurs féminines toi!

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