Free streaming radio from grubster capital of the world Austin, TX that manages to pull some punches:
# Artist: Oblivion
# Title: Your Mom’s Metal Show
# Genre: Other
# Year: 2010
# Length: 132:05 minutes (120.94 MB)
# Format: MP3 Stereo 44kHz 128Kbps (CBR)
Your mom sucks cocks in hipster bars.
I fucked Levy_Spearmen’s mom by standing up on a chair while she was bent doggie style. She moaned like a death metal vocalist.
If it does not have PRESENTATION then it is not RADIO, it’s just a COMPILATION. I’m sick of sites presenting themselves as radio but being nothing more than a compilation.
And where the hell is the playlist? I hear too much intro. Fuck off with the stupid movie soundbites. I’m not looking to be entertained, I’m looking to be informed. This is not informing me of anything. Even if it had cool songs I wouldn’t know who the artist is so it’s useless!
Why are you guys posting metal shows with nu-thrash and metalcore? I thought you were vehemently opposed to that to the point of your tiny little heads exploding?
Cool, V for Vedetta was awesome. guverments should fear there ppl… I might order a fedora and mask on ebay, heh
CHECK OUT THIS FUCKING AWESOME INTERVIEW WITH BESTIAL WARLUST:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FSk0Y3n2sQA
PURE HESSIAN DESTRUCTION!!!!!
Let me guess, is this KAOS radio show with Jeff Tandy? Isn’t that Austin’s pride and joy metalhead/hessian who works for the Anus staff? No wonder he gets so much accolades here. Both his bands are decent but not worth the press they get here at Anus. They’re better Texas bands.
Surprise surprise, the “philosophically oriented and objective” metal resource anus.com is just as much about scene mentality and favors for friends as anyone else.
Stop pimping out every turd that Austin, Texas squeezes out, plz.
Did you know my original intentions were to send niggers back to Africa? Think of the things that would be different if some impatient cocksucker wouldn’t have shot me.
But really, that playlist was terrible. Sifted through so much shit to get a Celtic Frost song and some Terrorizer.
Did you know that I was a Jew and I fuckin’ hate honkies? I couldn’t fuckin’ stand Andrew Johnson, my VP.
Also, I was secretly a queer.
Ah…. but yes, that playlist was shitty metalcore at it’s finest.
(chorus)
Tired of bein’ pushed around (jump mothafucka jump!)
Gonna go deep underground (jump mothafucka jump!)
My life is a deep scar (jump mothafucka jump!)
Gonna show you what you are (jump mothafucka jump!)
(breakdown)
Are you sick of life like me?
Do you feel so empty?
Are you ready to be free?
If you are then jump with me!
(chorus)
Tired of bein’ pushed around (jump mothafucka jump!)
Gonna go deep underground (jump mothafucka jump!)
My life is a deep scar (jump mothafucka jump!)
Gonna show you what you are (jump mothafucka jump!)
(second breakdown)
Does school make you happy?
Do you want equality?
We can make a better society
If you’ll only jump with me!
(chorus)
Jump motherfucker jump! (repeat 800x)
LOL YAY GO BRUNHILDE
Playlist:
Exodus, Lazarus AD, Whore of Babylon (from Texas), Arch Enemy, Hate Eternal, Lamb of God, In Flames, Heaven Shall Burn, Celtic Frost, Lamb of God, Fueled by Fire, HammerWhore, Angelkill, Terrorizer, Released Anger, Carcass, Warbringer, At The Gates, Megadeth, End of Days, Convixion.
Who is Jeff Tandy?
>mfw I didn’t even notice the At The Gates song.
Congratulating myself for never listened to it enough to recognize.
*using the abbreviation “appy” for appetizer
okay i think i figured it out. remember in the post where he talks about hipsters being hired by record lables and junk? maybe the last two blogposts were examples of hipsters being just doing what they do within a job that would be better done by someone who isnt an outsider looking in.
Idk, could be just some favors for friends like above commenter suggested.
Levy_Spearmen: Rouge lvl 3/Monk lvl 1
Int:16
Wis: 15
Cha: 17
Dex: 15
Con: 14
Str:13
Special abilities:
Quippy Remark: Once per day, Levy_Spearmen can utter a clever retort or comment to bring anguish to his foes. Enemies within a 50 ft radius must pass a will save equal to 1D20 + Levy’s current lvl. If they fail the check their feeling get hurt and they loose self esteem, gaining a -2 penalty on all attack and save roles. However if they pass the save, they receive a + 2 bonus on attacks and saves, because Levy made himself look like a try hard faggot.
Levy some Spearmen: Once per gaining a level, Levy_Spearmen can use his influence as a blog commentator to rally cohorts to him. LEvy must make a DC 18 influence check (add cha bonus) and if completed, he gains 1D6 + current LVL aspie warriors under his command.
CONSERVATIONIST CHANGED HIS LEGAL NAME TO NIGGER DICKS
NIGGER DICKS WILL RUN FOR PRESIDENT IN 2012
EXPECT RAMPANT HOMOSEXUAL ACTIVITY
MANDATORY SUCKING OF COCKS
2 SMALL OR 3 OR 4 BIG
ADrian Mccoy: lvl 3 commoner/ lvl 2 cleric of metal
str: 15
con: 16
dex: 10
wis: 8
cha:15
int:9
Special abilities:
Fuck Nu-Metal Jihad: similar to a barbarians rage, except the effects are doubled and Adrian must expend 1D12 hit points. It may be repeated as often as he chooses.
Rally Commenters: once per day, Adrian may muster all of his worldly power into inspiring fellow aspies to trollpost/blogpost under a variant of his moniker. Asp’s in a 100 foot range get a +4 bonus on all attack rolls and saving throws for 1D20 rounds.
Also note: a generic aspie warrior NPC is typically a lvl 1 commoner.
A generic Hessian warrior NPC is typically 1) a lvl 3 fighter 2) a lvl 3 barbarian 3) a lvl 2 fighter, lvl 1 druid or sorcerer or 3) a lvl 3 ranger.
A generic hipster is usually a lvl 1 commoner OR a lvl 1 rouge.
Brazil 2-0 Mexico
under 20 world cup
How many cocks does it take to satisfy the Mastodon queer?
How many cocks does it take to get their assholes sore?
How many Mastodon fans in da house?
Shit stained dick righ here ya’ll !!!!!!!
Why hello Mr. Barbarian Cock! I like the first two Mastodon albums, which means I like to ride a cock till my butthole bleeds. Am I a Mastodon fan? Do I like penis in my mouth?
Well, duh! I love open-minded metal.
do they play sun or solar metal?
@Barbarian Cock
It takes one long, wide cock to fill your mom’s asshole and make it sore so Mastodon as well as their fans are hung like horses.
Ugh, my head fucking hurts. Some fat nigger looking like Bluto from Animal House charged into me during a “wall of death” at a show, caught me completely by surprise cause the fucker ran before everyone else. Think I have whiplash.
Next time I see him, he’s getting stabbed.
>outsiders looking in
That perfectly describes anus’s relationship with the metal scene. No one shares your delirious views, aspies.
When someone here says “hessian brutality” you know he is:
1) one of them faggot no0bs into “metal” at the wrong website
2) a retarded poser that thinks anything under the name Hessian must be good
3) a homo kid trying hard to convince himself that liking Mastodon is no so embarrasing
.
I love big fat nigger dick just like my mother…and father.
gay anus
http://www.anus.com/metal/about/blog/pivot/entry.php?id=666
SQUATTED 290LB TODAY. FUCK YEA, BEARMODE HERE I COME.
When someone here mentions “SQUATTED 290LB TODAY. FUCK YEA, BEARMODE HERE I COME” you know he is:
1) one of them faggot no0bs into “metal” at the wrong website
2) a retarded poser that thinks anything under the name Hessian must be good
3) a homo kid trying hard to convince himself that liking Conqueror, Bestial Barnuts or any other “black metal” (if you say so) crap is any good.
Mastodon slays. Fuck off if you don’t like. Stop being a rectum and appreciate good music you fuckin’ queer.
Sometimes I log on to facebook.com and jerk off to pictures of girls I went to high school with.
You sound like a colossal pussy faggot. What’s the matter brah, is Conqueror too intense for you? Maybe you should go back to blowing the members in your intellectual post-metal band.
No, Conqueror is too boring for me. It sounds like I’m listening to Teletubbies, fucking children’s shit I want nothing to do with.
>BEARMODE
lol, confirmed for obese midget
You guys are hilariously…lame…
But then again this website is named anus.com so…
Even though I think you guys are stupid..I am curious as to know what you guys think about the band Amon Amarth…
And try to critique the band in a way that does not invole talking about cocks please…
A-mon (on a cock) Amarth are cocksuckers who play “power”(cock) metal and suck cocks while doing so.
Did you not read the last post that was written about them? We slaughtered them. We don’t tolerate cock-gobblers and their cock-gobbling fans.
Indeed, Conqueror is pure garbage. Not too harsh or brutal just pure trash.
War metal is Reisigbündel.
Just read my name asshole and you’ll figure me out…
All I wanted to do was ask you a simple question and you blew it…grow up and get a girlfriend you fucking dork…
STOP FUCKING CALLING ME A MIDGET YOU MALNOURISHED ROMANIAN PIECE OF SHIT. I AM STRONG AS FUCK AND EVEN IF YOU WERE TALLER THAN ME I COULD STILL TAKE YOU DOWN IN A SECOND AND FUCKING CRIPPLE YOU FOR LIFE. NOW GO BACK TO EATING DICKS.
AS FOR THE FAGGOTS DISSING THE GRANDIOSE GENRE OF WAR METAL, FUCK OFF AND DIE. WAR METAL IS THE PURE EXPRESSION OF EVIL AND INTENSITY, SCREW YOU ALL.
>thinks war metal is the most evil and intense thing ever
>must not have heard Pelican yet
You sound like a sexy motherfucker. Tell me, if you can bench that much, then how much dick can you swallow? I know you weight-lifting meat/metalheads from Detroit have sexy bodies and nice cock-gobbling dick. We can get down with some Conqueror in the background. We can have an all out war with each others bodies. If this sounds like fun, get in touch. ;)
Benching isn’t the same thing as deadlifting or squatting, faggot.
You sound like a tough, sexy guy. I bet you have some nice thick thighs I’d like wrapped around my face. I bet you got a thick, long dick too, honey. I’d leave your cock up my ass for a week and suck you dry whilst we listen to Mastodon and Gojira all night long.
Sorry, I meant to say Bestial Warlust, Gojira and the new Morbid Angel album. Mastodon is too brutal for gay fucking. Sounds like a sensual, sexy fuckin’ time baby. Yeah!!!1
brutal slayer of christians, noble hessian warrior of death: Hessian Barbarian lvl 2/ Firghter lvl 2/ Monk lvl 5. Chaotic Neutral.
Str: 18
Dex: 14
Con: 16
Int: 13
Wis: 14
Cha: 12
Special Abilities:
Slayer of Christians: same as a rangers “favoured enemy” ability but applies to all creatures of the christian faith. Brutal Slayer must make a DC 18 will save to avoid attacking NPC christians that are non aggressive (or even friendly) towards him.
Power Lust: for every opponent Brutal Slayer reduces to 0 hit points or less, he gains 1D3 temporary hit points.
>Power Lust
I think you mean penis lust.
His special weakness is taste in music.
Negura Voda: lvl 1 commoner. Lawful Evil.
Int:8
CHa:10
Wis:1
Str:10
De:14
Con:16
Special Abilities:
Irritate Hessian: 3 times per day Negura can utter an annoying comment on hessian culture that will cause hessian to get butthurt. Hessians in a 200ft radius of Negura must make a DC 18 will save, if failed, they receive a -1 penalty on all saving throws and attack rolls. The effects of this can be made null by a “inspire hessian” or similar spell.
Power Metal Might: negura is a HUGE fan of power metal and receives a +2 bonus on all attack and saving throws if there is power metal playing within 100 ft. Negura receives a -2 penalty if it is actually good power metal, like Manilla Road or Slough Feg.
“Metal is just aspic noise”: Negura can utter this phrase to counter the effects of a Hessian bard’s “bardic music” ability once per day. The bard must pass a DC 18 spellcraft check or have his bardic music be countered.
I think there’s a 1 missing in front of that intelligence score, champ. Or should I say chimp?
Hi. I love throbbing cock in my asshole. When the crescendo in Godspeed You Black Emperor’s “East Hastings” comes, that is the point when I can fit an entire glass jar into my ass. God I love this band!
are we talking like a blackberry jam jar or a pickle jar?
Ok little faggot turd. I wanna help you. I could have my way with your hipster ass if I wanted, but you’d probably enjoy that too much you cumm-slurping fag. I think you’re screaming for help and attention. I’ll give it to you, I’ll help you, little shit-stained fuckwad.
I have been a metal head for over two decades now. It has not been an easy ride. I have sacrificed many of the life experiences that make you a “normal” person in order to dedicate myself entirely to being a true metalhead.
I do not have friends except “Reign in Blood” and “Blood Fire Death”. My hand is, has been and will continue to be my only girl friend. People dislike me.
Do I regret having dedicated my life to underground metal? No fucking way! Not one single day. I would never change the transcendental cathartic emotions of listening to Dark Throne’s 3rd or Summoning’s 2nd, at midnight in the darkness of my bedroom!
I have never seen a hipster in my life nor do I care about their existence. However, I have earned my right to pity the fools who do not know what real metal is, just as much as they pity me for being what I am.
It’s a pickle jar. I don’t even eat pickles I just bought the jar of pickles for the look! Haha it’s so fun being ironic. Then realize how pleasantly surprised I was when I seen that hulking piece of glass sitting in my fridge whilst playing Godspeed You! Black Emperor on vinyl. I’ll tell you, stuffing three plump dill pickles in your asshole while listening to “Lift Your Skinny Fists Like Antennas to Heaven” is truly transcendental. In fact, it helped raise my skinny penis to the sky as I came in unison.
“that manages to pull some punches”
So, they are fucking wimps?
I think I must have really been brain damaged at that show because I’m getting a craving for hardcore punk, crust, d-beat and dirty old-school Swedish/Finnish death metal.
anus populace = chronic cock suckers
Parents, teach your fetuses about the dangers of illicit drug use.
Oi yu, ya kno tham da conts in du govrmnt wed dem texes en al dat. Dem fockin wenkers innit? Meks yu wenne smesh a karr. Dem ryots een Lenden ere joost de begennen ainit? Ey teld yu so on da lest twenty albooms!
Sickle hrep drep negligence, write a class to suck guys.
After eating a spicy pepper, do not touch your cock.
Hello, I am Tori Amos. I just wanted to let everyone know that I already did a Slayer cover. So if Lady Gaga covers a Slayer song then you should know that I did the same thing a long time before she did. I’m much hipper than Lady Gaga! At least I have some class and don’t look like a Jewish transsexual. Please don’t forget about me (if you’re over 30 years old you probably never will)
My new album titled “Night of Hunters” will be out in September. I encourage all hessians and hipsters to buy it because it will contain something for everyone!
Tori amos’s cover was undisputably better than the original, something that only happened twice before that in rock music’s history (Hendrix on All along the watchtower and Queensryche’s Scarborough Fair).
A big sexy hessian took me back to his place after I met him at a gay club once, he was a gentle lover though. I loved the way he rubbed my nipples, he said he was going to put some music on to get us in the mood but he put on a Mastodon CD. This totally turned me off, it was way too brutal and heavy for sensual love-making. I asked him to put Belus by Burzum on and we came together and spooned til the morning light.
Are you female? I mean females dance at gay clubs too.
No way man! I wish I was though… I’m justa regular Mastodon fan trying hard to pretend I’m into Hessian stuff just to get near manly cock.
I luv Mastodon, it’s the music for the queer of heart and balls of steel!!!
At this point, you have a society which promotes dumb, ugly and destructive people over those who have more beneficial traits, simply because dumb, ugly and destructive people have a need to disunitively make profit at the expense of others.
Something tells me this people will never be appreciating Beethoven, or even Emperor.
lol. You have got to be fucking kidding me. To make a profit takes at least some intelligence, you can’t be dumb. You, on the other hand, sitting behind your keyboard, most assuredly are.
And please tell me, exactly what advantage does musical taste confer? Especially if you’re listening to garbage like black metal? What bearing does something as innocuous as their choice in music have on their life, if they’re successful? At best it entertains them, at worst they become aspie faggots bitter about the most horrible shit.
@ Legolas of the Wooden Realm
Hey, I like Emperor. And Gentle Giant.
You need me.
You need my cock inside or you.
You love to suck jizz.
Lets meet.
TROLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
dammit stupidd anus go fuck yourself in shitdiehard lololol
BAR BAR BAR BAR BAR BAR BAR BAR BAR BAR BAR BAR BAR BAR BAR BAR BAR