Metallica Pop-Up Store in NYC

Metallica have opened up a pop-up store in New York City for the weekend to coincide with their Hardwired… To Self-Destruct US tour. If you live in New York and still don’t have copies of Kill ’em All, Ride the Lightning, or Master of Puppets, you’re not shit out of luck; you can go and buy¬†them on CD if you still buy CDs. The remasters sound fine even if they are more compressed than the eighties CDs. Lars’ drumming is mediocre¬†and Hetfield already ran his guitar through a limiter on Ride the Lightning onward so who cares.

All the rest of the merchandise for sale is of a cash grab for fifteen year olds’ money. Expect to meet a few idiots with Metallica tattoos who of course smell like booze and weed and want to slobber all over their idols like a dog showing his master a chew toy. Metallica want to sell all the Hardwired… to Self-Destruct merchandise they have printed for a hefty markup to die hard fans who will wear it to their kids softball games to show how much they loved Metallica when they were fourteen to the other drunk dads. Metallica love your money too.

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4 thoughts on “Metallica Pop-Up Store in NYC”

  1. Parasite says:

    Well ill have to pick up one of those snappy new mugs ha ha ha! That’ll throw my neighbors off in the morning as i stand on my front porch, sippin my cup o joe… with my pisshard cock sticking through my flannel robe.

    1. “We’re so fucked” “Shit out of luck”

      Because people are going to automatically associate these stock phrases with Metallitard, right?

      1. Up there with “My lifestyle determines my death style.” and “I am the table.”

  2. GGALLIN1776 says:

    Unadulterated faggotry.

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