Slayer Playing The Tonight Show

Slayer are booked to play The Tonight Show hosted by Jimmy Fallon this Thursday, July 27th.

The band will be playing “Raining Blood” off Reign in Blood. Network and cable television is truly dying if they can’t book anyone more popular than Slayer. Slayer do not appeal to Jimmy Fallon’s three second attention span millennial audience who favor tunes that can be reduced to five second commercial jingles for selling candy, cartoons, and adult products. Are Slayer going to debut a new product on a a mediocre later night television program? The band have already made BMX bikes just like Blasphemy made skateboards.

How about Reign in Blood brand tampons for active lifestyle women? Slayer could have a line of thin, sturdy sanitary pads too that female Slayer fans could wear under spandex when they try to collect their child support payments.

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6 thoughts on “Slayer Playing The Tonight Show”

  1. intpaki says:

    the face when slayer haven’t been good since before i was born

  2. Fake Metal, Scam Label says:

    Slayer news makes me die inside a little more each time.

  3. Red snowflakes….coolbeans

  4. canadaspaceman says:

    meh. When Slayer played on the Jon Stewart show in the early 1990s, and Megadeth was on the Arsenio Hall and David Letterman shows, that was pretty cool, but these days?
    At least when Mustaine and his guys play on the Jimmy Kimmel tv show, they sometimes surprise us. (eg. Dressing up as monsters on Halloween, or playing Christmas songs in a funny, aggressive style that stuns the regular viewer, etc.)
    I agree, late night comedy shows currently suck really bad.
    If you want guaranteed laughs, then watch old shows by Johnny Carson, Letterman, Conan O’Brien.

    1. Syphilis says:

      Talk shows are yet another wonderful cancer from the land of freedom. The best ones were nothing more than glorious monkey shitflinging, more carnal and warlike than modern metal could ever hope to be. The comparison between television and what the internet starts to make sense now, as talk shows and call ins were pretty much the precursor of what image boards and comments sections would become later, yet also possessing that which the later lacks, in the form of a crazed spectacle.


  5. canadaspaceman says:

    the only times I watch Fallon is if there is a guest I am interested in, and even then, a 50/50 chance it will be good…
    and, the song’s been posted. No idea if they were on for any more, and … not surprised I am disappointed in modern Slayer. Shitty mix, and crap guitar sound for one thing.

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