The tantalizingly-named Blasphemy Day International is basically a thinly-veiled excuse to troll Muslims who were offended by cartoon caricatures of the Prophet Mohammed (PBUH); if you ask me, it’s kind of a shitty passive-aggressive way of going about this.
However, it’s also a good excuse for blasphemy, and we need more of that.
The holiday is on September 30. This year, why not:
I. Increase the Traditional Blasphemy
Our tribute to this is the Internet Altar of Unholy Blasphemy and The Christian Holocaust.
II. Force People to Accept the Genius of Paul Ledney
Not enough people know the sacred words:
Rip the sacred flesh
Sodomize the holy asshole
Drink the red blood of the mother of earth
Masturbation on the dead body of christ
The king of Jews is dead
and so are the lies
Vomit on the host of Heaven
Masturbate on the throne of God
Break the seals of angels
Drink the sweet blood of Christ
Taste the flesh of the priest
Sodomize holy nuns
The king of Jews is a liar
The Heavens will burn
Dethrone the son of God
God is dead
Holyness is gone
Purity is gone
Prayers are burned
Covered in black shit
Rape the holy ghost
Unclean birth of Jesus Christ
Heaven will fall
Fuck the church
Fuck Christ
Fuck the Virgin
Fuck the gods of Heaven
Fuck the name of Jesus
III. Extend this humanism, the secular form of populist religion
If we can blaspheme Islam and Christianity for being ignorant, how about humanism?
Humanism is the idea that humans are more important than reality, and that they’re all equal, and that their feelings matter.
The fact is that most humans are shitheads, and we want to celebrate the few good ones.
Spread this blasphemy:
- Use the R-word. Mock the retarded, kick cripples out of wheelchairs, rape the cowering, sodomize the meek, etc.
- Make fun of stupidity. It’s not polite to do this. Blaspheme! Do it.
- Mention overpopulation. People hate to hear about this. There’s too many of us, and not everyone can be special!
- Mock TMPR. Too Much Positive Reinforcement (TMPR) is “the belief, against all available evidence, that one is meant for Special Things.”
People hate it when you rape sacred cows, then cut their heads off and make them into burgers. Do it. With extra ketchup.
Weird man, fuckin’ weird. How about you do these things and we’ll watch you instead? Put up weekly post of you fucking “holy cows” and beheading them.
this is like, so hardcore man
my mom is gonna freak!
Some people say it don’t matter what color you is but they full of it. Lemme tell you: the darker you is, the mo’ they be hatin’ on you. I know this because I’m the blackest turd you’ll ever see. I’m the Wesley Snipes of turds. Shit even some brother turds hate on me cuz I’m so black. I call this subconscious racism because most people don’t even seem to be aware of it. To most people a turd is just a turd but what really goes on is the darker you is the mo’ people gonna hate on you. This is evidence of how the white man brainwashed everyone into believing that white is good and black is bad. The white man did this so he could subdue all the races and turn once proud nations into slave colonies and eventually rape Africa into becoming the Turd World.
All these songs are excellent but what about more intellectual blasphemous songs like Blessed are the Sick, Kingdom Gone and Jesus Wept?
@ brutal slayer of…
because the songs you listed are beating around the bush, Havohej says it plain and simple, and it echoes in the back of our minds forever ….SODOMIZE THE HOLY ASSHOLE…
Yeah dude, KILL THE RETARDS! Totally hardcore! The other day, I slowed down for a hitchhiker, THEN I SPED UP AGAIN!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHA HAIL SATAN
“The fact is that most humans are shitheads, and we want to celebrate the few good ones.”
Every single human believes this, and every single human believes that the are one of those special few. How convenient, that everyone is horrible and not special but us!!!!!!!!!!!
Maybe positivity is real blasphemy in our decade of bland cynicism. We are all equal as human beings made from the same kind of flesh and blood :)
“Use the R-word.”
Ok.
Greasy conservative metalheads who equate humanism to religion are retarded.
oh geez did I do it wrong
Anus is what happens when trailer trash discovers Schopenhauer.
"Spread this Blasphemy"
Yes, go forth my aspies and proselytize to the masses! I guess ANUS really thinks that the average productive citizen with a job, family and friends gives a fuck about the half-baked ideologies of the monkey who changes the oil in their SUV.
If you’re convinced there are too many people then take a stand: kill yourself.
Disregard that, I forgot to take my pills this morning. I also suck cocks. I like to cut my mouth with a razor before I perform fellatio on a thug, hoping to increase my viral load so I can die sooner. My life really sucks. :(
The above comment was fake and gay.
More like, Celibate Blasphemy.
No it’s true, I really hate my life and want to die. I also love nigger cock. And yes, I have hemorrhoids, way to rub it in. :(
> Kicks a guy in a wheelchair.
> has killed stephen hawkings.
> who should have died ?