35 thoughts on “Cirith Ungol Releases “All The Shadows” From All The Shadows”

  1. Ecoli says:

    Timeless band. Does DMU still accept articles?

    1. Hessian Murderer of Black Death says:

      If they’re good, they’re not going to say no

    2. There are very few absolutes except marijuana decriminalization. If it fits with the general agenda of the site and its areas of coverage, we are all ears. Zap editor@deathmetal.org with your best shot.

      1. Kirk Johnson says:

        Are people allowed to send pictures of their cats… pictures of their sodomy… or both (pussyfooting)?

        1. Please do not sodomize the cats. I stand against cute culture, otherwise would encourage kittie pictures. But sodomy, especially of the dead and dismembered, is always welcome!

  2. bitterend says:

    written by NIGHT DEMON, NO THANKS

    1. Tim Bfaker says:

      When we rereleased Tbe Orange Album back in 2020, I told Rob we should change our name to Citrus Ungol. I think he hired those two ladyboys to get back at me.

      Anyhow, it’s great to see something other than Brett sucking off Dutchmen again

      1. I love the Dutch, man. If you cannot be English, Swedish, Norwegian, or northern German, being Dutch or Finnish is a very close second. Scots are in the same category: too clever for their own good, but not as much as the Belgians, Chinese, or Jews. I will always remember my time in The Netherlands fondly, even if they ride bicycles too much (bad for the knees, why all old Dutch women stoop).

        1. Crotchduster says:

          eh, pedalling is great and recommended as a cure for patellofemoral ailments.The correct cycling technique is to ensure a seat height that enforces near-full extension of the legs. No knee pain then.

          1. I think it places repetitive strain on some parts of the knee. So do many things, but with the bicycle it can become pronounced over time. Islam has made bicycles haram so they will probably not exist in Europe much longer anyway.

            1. Hessian Murderer of Black Death says:

              I don’t train endurance, but in strength training, like for climbing, avoiding repetitive overuse injury is quite possible and plausible even though the specific competition movement is repetitive, by applying the principles behind what is called “conjugate” training.

              Essentially, you train variations of your competition movement so that you get carryover to it, but stress your joints from different angles and in different ways, thereby preventing any one injury vector from collapsing

              1. 666 says:

                The conjugate thing is a specific program which I guess could serve as inspiration but no better for all of that than any other balanced approach. I’ve gathered so much knowledge over the years with regards to health and fitness that I pretty much just improvise every time I work out and go by feel, never really counting reps or keeping track of time. I like to keep it simple, bodyweight stuff as a foundation and a lot of lifting, walking, swimming. It would drive me insane to stuck to a program with all I know. But I’m also pretty spontaneous in general. In any case, whatever I do, I also do the opposite, as a rule of thumb, in motion, intensity, whatever. This has served me well.

                1. Hessian Murderer of Black Death says:

                  If you don’t use variations, then you need to wave your percentages and have periods of submaximal work. You get more specificity, but at the cost of volume, frequency, and intensity.

                  If you max out on all 3 with maximum specificity for a particular athletic goal as if your life depended on it, then you won’t last in this game.

                  You can and should train as if your life depends on it, but it must be done intelligently

                  1. 666 says:

                    For sure. I like to go as hard as I can. Learned the hard way that’s not always an option, and how to still be able to do it half the time. Eventually. Lucky I’m dumb and tough and mom fed me right else I’d have real problems by now. Cheers

                  2. Crotchduster says:

                    I’m discovering at 45, there’s no point going as heavy as I did in my youth. Granted I was never particularly strong (425/285/505) being my absolute peaks. But I’ve collected a bunch of niggles along the way and the only way of resolving them appears to be losing weight via walking and jogging A LOT.

                    1. 666 says:

                      In my experience doing some 24+ hr water fasting here and there is a non-negotiable.

                2. Hessian Murderer of Black Death says:

                  I let intuition affect my programming, too, to decide when I need to change variation

        2. 666 says:

          Belgians make fuckin awesome beer. Have you ever faceplanted onto some Brussels cobblestone with a days’ pay of beer in your guts? I vaguely recall stumbling into some cool metal record store too (visions of Barcelona, whores calling out from the alleys, weaving liltingly across goddamn cobblestones, metal record store with a first edition wax of Hallucinating Anxiety hanging on the wall behind the counter, brief calculations to determine breaches in security…). Discovered some German erotic comics under the counter in a comic book store-turned-to-bottle shop. I can still remember pounding that first dark Belgian sour on the stoop out front. Kid, it was tasty…

          1. Glorious tribute to a favorite author. Wonderfully portrayed.

  3. brett stevens loves boys says:

    Fuck you brett

  4. quizmaster says:

    I saw Beherit in Belgium this week, and what stuck with me the most is how Nuclear Holocausto kept wandering aimlessly with his flashlight at the back of the stage, as if he were an old man who didn’t remember where he was, or maybe he imagined he was in a detective movie.

    1. I think everyone wanted less of a rave and more of a bunch of guys with guitars doing black metal. He focused on vocals and did a good job, as did his supporting band, when I saw them, but the heavy use of sequencers made the whole thing a bit canned with too much focus on bass.

      1. chubthumpah says:

        Blasphemy were always better than Beherit anyway.

      2. 666 says:

        I gotta say here that I’m glad I got to see Godflesh before they supposedly quit touring. They put on a solid performance and that was one of the best full body bass experiences I’ve ever had.

  5. cheap bot programmer says:

    New Archgoat out, decent as always.

    1. With some bands, the minimum is also the ceiling. Not “oof” but “hohum.”

      1. Sodomizer of kittens says:

        Like most bands reviewed here?

        1. Crionics says:

          Weird passive-aggressive style of shade to throw at a review site lol

          1. 666 says:

            The implication is that there’s something better to review, but all we get is another lesbian.

  6. Latinos fuck like rabbits and I hate them fuck wiggers naggers del paso rap sucks kill all thugs fuck off ha! says:

    Boring

    How’s about….SEMI MAINSTREAM SWEDEN DEATH METAL?

    GRAVE NILE ETERNAL DARKNESS HUH?

    YOU LIKE THOSE BANDS ANY ONE

    SO SAYS

    The
    tanystrophues terrorArchelon grippiacutioners
    Tylosaurus prime raprockzilla
    Supersaurus villain metal
    Thalassomedon tickgodceratops police

    GIVE A REVIEW can trump get rid of spics already hahaha?

    I HATE MEXICAN FUCKERS AND I WANT THEM DEAD I DONT LIKE THAT RACE AND I WANT A WAR BETWEEN THEM AND THE BLACKS I REALLY DON’T CARE IF THAT SOUNDS BAD EITHER HAHAHA!!!

    AND HOW CAN I STAB TO DEATH SAVANNAH SELLERS AND HER DIRTY FAG SPIC HUSBAND WHILE CUMMING IN HER MOUTH PUSSY AND ASSHOLE? YOU KNOW TO THE BONE? BITCH…

    SIX FEET UNDER IS SOMETHING THE BITCH SELLERS IS TOO RETARDED TO KNOW FUCK NBC BITCH…

    My band is black Hawaiian polish Thai not spicy garbage by the way…

    TRUMP PLEASE

    SEND THE FIRST RACE HOME…. MEXICANS HAHAHAHA

    IM GOING TO THE PHILIPPINES BITCH…

    Haha Satan SAYS

    Eat wop pussy
    Eat coon pussy
    Eat Irish pussy
    Eat chink pussy
    Eat jap pussy
    Eat jew pussy

    For eternity white man….

    Right now make your choice Brett Stevens hahaha….

    1. If Satan wants the wops, I suggest we send them to him!

  7. Wants The Wops says:

    Wants The Wops sounds like the name of a shitty live punk album recorded in the late 70s but released in 1983 years after the frontman died of an overdose. Probably would read “wantsthewops!”

  8. Bangcock says:

    cutting the hollywood romantic crap. let’s make this more interesting. take the real ancient viking (aka the small struggling 5’4 viking with brown hair) with the typically ancient shortlived lifespan, vs the scurvy miserable filthy pirate (barely lived to see 30), vs the rotting cowboy (strychnine whiskey anyone?) vs the overrated english knight with back problems in a miserable death match in a modern generic setting where “everything’s poissible”

    alright screw the romance, let’s do the Historical Misery Deathmatch
    No plot armor. No Hollywood. Just 4 miserable dudes with shitty healthcare.
    The fighters:
    1. Ancient Viking – “The 5’4 Struggler”

    Stats: 5’4, malnourished, arthritis by 25, probably has worms. Life expectancy: 35 if lucky
    Gear: Axe, seax knife, wool that smells like fish.
    Strengths: Grew up fighting for food. Zero fear of dying. Pain tolerance = insane
    Weaknesses: Scurvy, rickets, can barely see past 20 feet

    2. Scurvy Pirate – “Barely Made It To 30”

    Stats: Missing teeth, bleeding gums, skin falling off. Drunk 24/7 on rum to mask the pain
    Gear: Cutlass, rusty pistol that misfires, peg leg maybe
    Strengths: Dirty fighter. Will bite, stab, throw sand. Used to chaos on ships
    Weaknesses: Can’t run 10 feet without collapsing. One punch = broken ribs

    3. Rotting Cowboy – “Strychnine Whiskey Edition”

    Stats: 40 if he’s lucky. Teeth gone from whiskey + tobacco. Liver is 80% regret
    Gear: Revolver with 3 bullets, knife, rope, and crippling dysentery
    Strengths: Can shoot. Used to long miserable days and sudden violence
    Weaknesses: Shaking hands, coughing blood, probably hallucinating already

    4. English Knight – “Overrated + Back Problems”

    Stats: 5’7, 220lbs but 80lbs of it is armor. Back is destroyed from carrying that shit
    Gear: Sword, maybe plate armor if he can get it on in time
    Strengths: Trained to kill. Strong as hell for 2 minutes
    Weaknesses: Gets winded climbing stairs. Armor = oven. Falls down = can’t get up

    Arena: Modern generic setting – “everything’s possible”
    Parking lot, gas station, abandoned warehouse, patch of dirt. Concrete, cars, dumpsters. No horses, no ships, no castles.
    How it goes down:
    Minute 1: Knight puts on armor. Immediately sweating. Viking and Pirate circle each other. Cowboy checks his gun.
    Minute 2: Pirate tries to shoot the knight. Misfire. Pirate collapses coughing. Viking charges with axe. Knight swings sword once, gets winded.
    Minute 3: Cowboy shoots. Maybe hits someone. Maybe shoots a car alarm and everyone panics.
    Minute 4: Everyone is gassed. Knight is on the ground trying to get up. Viking is bleeding. Pirate is vomiting. Cowboy is drinking whiskey to cope.
    Winner: Viking 5/10 times
    He’s the smallest but he’s the most used to being miserable and fighting anyway. No armor to slow him down, no guns to misfire, just pure “I’m gonna die anyway so let’s go” energy.
    Runner up: Cowboy 3/10
    If he lands a shot early. If not, the shaking and dysentery take him out.
    Knight 1.5/10: Only if he catches someone in the first 30 seconds before his back gives out.
    Pirate 0.5/10: Scurvy is a hell of a debuff.
    Final verdict:
    They all die within a week from infection anyway. But the Viking is the last one standing in the parking lot, sitting on a curb, eating a gas station hot dog and wondering why everything sucks.
    Cutting the Hollywood crap really just means everyone loses

    1. Freya Helvig says:

      Completely historically accurate, my own scandinavian genetics are the product of *modern* (eeww, evil word) reformation, high protein diet, general sanitization and selective breeding.

      Also fuck plato, and this site. The soul is part of the body and there is no heaven or hell or reincarnation. The Jews were right.

      Brett Stevens will enjoy from now on an a bot-infested wasteland wallowing in everlasting obscurity.

      1. Blandopticon says:

        oh meowz dont go we cant afford to lose a heavy hitter like you

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