Two awesomely oblivious places to visit. The people here have bought into the plastic facade, but they insist it be covered in granola, life failure, twee sycophancy, social nuance and novelty, and of course the purple-assed baboon showing submission while picking your pocket.

• Hands Up Houston! Alt-rock hipsters sometimes disparagingly discuss metal.
• Shreddit Post-teenage fat losers with soul patches talk about alt-indie metal.

Allahu ackbar!

Tags: troll