Far worse than Slayer‘s BMX bikes and Abbath‘s shower curtains, Metallica have a new modeling gig selling mediocre suits to douchebags. Kill ’em All.
Tags: fags, idiots, merch, merchandise, metallica, stinking shit, worse than shit
16 thoughts on “Metallica Model for Brioni”
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Italian Metallica:
Trapped Under Iced Limoncello.
The Call of Chianti.
For Rome the Bell Tolls.
…Alighieri for All
Dante’s Eve
Medici of Puppets.
Got to be some other ones.
Gaytallica should sum it up just fine.
who wears a ball cap and a toque with a suit?? fucking goof!
Looking foward for their new album…NOT!
Ulrich with the gay-ass duckface.
Now Metallica are obviously way passed their prime and the musical embarrassments are stacking higher and higher as we speak. However, calling Brioni “mediocre” is simply stating lackluster knowledge in the sartorial realm, and possibly more than a drop of pleb blood flowing in ones veins. Sure, the Roman silhouette is not for everyone yet Brioni remains in the top echelon of RTW, MTM, and bespoke alike.
P.S. Have a listen to Ulrich’s ramlbings as a temporary radio host in Sweden: http://sverigesradio.se/sida/avsnitt/743224?programid=2071
Pastallica.
Searching for “brioni metallica”, because did not know what were you talking about:
“Can Metallica Convince You to Buy a $7,000 Suit? | GQ”
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Metallica and Brioni Team Up – Metallica
https://metallica.com/blog/news/427620/brioni
1 day ago – We are beyond thrilled to have been invited to be the face of Italian luxury menswear powerhouse Brioni as they kick off their first creative
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ya-hoo. I only feel good for the Suicidal Tendencies guy, that guy won the lottery.
No…that’s just his face…
“You know, we’re not tryin’ to be something big and fancy. It’s just us, doin’ what we do. Like to keep it that way.”
RIP Cliff.
Brioni is some good suits
I’ve been revisiting two Metallica tracks I used to like lately, Hit the Lights and Whiplash, and the result was very disappointing: The first made me think I’d have to fault Metallica for inventing Guns’n’Roses (I’ve heard rumours about something named Motley Crue but refuse to believe in them) and second just came across as someone trying to play something an audience known to him he considered to be total retards would probably like. I’ve never heard much of of Ride the Lightning. Master of Puppets is sort-of cool because of its machine-like precision but that’s also what stops it from being really good: It’s essentially dead, a commendably accomplished style exercise. I used to own And Justice For All (2nd metal record I ever bought) but never really knew what to make of it. It’s like the former, just that someone turned the motor off and the wheel is now still spinning for a while (for hopefully obvious reasons, history stops here).
I’m inclined to think that Metallica was a copycat from the start and took some time until they managed to hit a money-making formula. Anything good the band ever recorded?
They have some all right pieces:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1S_psfS3vY
Ride the Lightning (the album) is pretty epic; I’ve always enjoyed ‘Fade to Black’ and ‘The Call of Ktulu’ especially.
This!
Also, Kill ’em All is pretty good for dumb thrash metal. Great for pounding beers, skateboarding, driving fast. It involves user participation to be really effective.
Well I WAS going to buy those big Kill Em All and Ride The Lightning boxes…