Sadistic Metal Reviews 7-27-2016

fat pride parade

The mentally ill delude themselves into believing they’re something they’re not and expect the rest of the world to fall in line with their fantastical psychosis. The Death Metal Underground staff doesn’t.

sewercide - immortalized in suffering

Sewercide – Immortalized in Suffering (2016)
Sewercide have a Turkka Rantanen Lovecraftian painting, they have an italicized b-list death metal album title font, and they have a crappy black and white band picture but what they don’t have is the music. The opening track, “For Those About to Rot”, AC/DC title parody reminds one of Swansong‘s Neil Young one. The music is Pestilence, Asphyx, esoteric Finnish leads, and Z-list chug death like Cancer and Benediction tossed in a salad with Leprosy-era Death. The problem is the band never does anything close to clever and all of the riffs and leads are both uninspired and unmemorable. Immortalized in Suffering is an album destined to inhabit used CD bins in six months.  The composition copies the repetitive “One riff, two riff, red riff, blue riff” Dr. Seuss songwriting of Chuck Schuldiner.

warfather - the grey eminence

Warfather – The Grey Eminence (2016)
More lame Morbid Angel worship in the style of Angelcorpse and Perdition Temple meets the random incongruity of metalcore. The Grey Eminence has no urgency or reason to exist other than for Steve Tucker to play around at “death metal” and show he can make a more competent album than Illud Divinum Insanus. Warfather is so incredibly boring and repetitive it resembles something on the order of Behemoth more than Morbid Angel and makes one yearn to be listening even to Formulas Fatal to the Flesh instead.

necroptic engorgement - realms of incessant suffering

Necroptic Engorgement – Realms of Incessant Bloodshed (2016)
Death metal wannabees playing deathcore, that is a post-hardcore or metalcore band attempting to play death metal and failing miserably. Necroptic Engorgement need to ditch the hardcore song structure and organize their nu-Immolation meets the Black Dahlia Murder riffs narratively to avoid listener suicide. Or just stop attempting and miserably failing to play metal and play the post-hardcore Converge crap they really want to.

sorcery - garden of bones

Sorcery – Garden of Bones (2016)

Testament trying to be Entombed or God Macabre and of course falling on their face yet again.

heathen beast - rise of the saffron empire

Heathen Beast – Rise of the Saffron Empire (2016)
Anti Hindu national socialist metalcore that sounds more like what Hadji from Johnny Quest raves out to at goth clubs than heavy metal. Anti-fascist lyrics alone won’t make your music black metal. The thousand year curry reich ain’t happening anyway.

seedna forlorn

Seedna – Forlorn (2016)
Lame hipster indie music pretending to be black metal and evil. Forlorn comes across as comically awful. What is that sensual smoker whisper? Is that your bedroom voice Seedna? Are you a leather daddy and this is how you talk to your gimps? Why are your songs twenty minutes long? This is background music for Stained fans. Forlorn sounds like an extremely slowed down Marilyn Manson. Korn on Codeine.

bestialized cover

Beastialized – Termestella Cvltvs (2016)
Bestialized want to be Immortal but their music ends up sounding more like a Gothenburg band caught by their disappointed pop music management playing Battles In the North in their van. Tons of Immortal riff theft in repetitive rock song structures only endears you to scenesters. Beer metallers will smash a bottle over your head as you ripped off one of the biggest Norwegian bands they like to sing along to. How do you expect to fly on the wings of ravens to Blashyrkh with Abbath playing crap like this? Abbath will never let you snort lines backstage with him after hearing this piece of shit Beastialized.

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25 thoughts on “Sadistic Metal Reviews 7-27-2016”

  1. I blew my head off like Per Ohlin says:

    “The thousand year curry reich ain’t happening.”
    Modi begs to differ.

  2. Daniel Lovertwat says:

    What about Ungod and Dark Funeral ?

  3. ODB says:

    You really love the smell of egg on face, don’t you? Heathen Beast aren’t anti-Islamic at all. Their dubious selling point is catering to the secular atheism in vogue among the country’s educated, Marxist classes. They are vehemently anti-nationalist, and lash out against the right wing party in power at the centre. Their lyrics focus almost exclusively on pogroms visited on Muslims during the last twenty years. The color saffron has roots in ancient Vedic Hinduism, hence the disparaging tone of the album title.

    Shit band, no doubt, but if you’re going to give some quasi-political slant to your review, however dismissive it may be, at least do some research first.

    1. Same thing, different audience. I added two words and changed one.

    2. Anthony says:

      I was about to say that anti-Islamic Thousand Year Curry Reich under the Saag dynasty sounded like a decent foundation for a band. Anti-Islamic “hate speech” is one of the most metal things you can so. Varg’s pro-church burning argument was that the stavekirks were built on top of horghs; we’d be remiss to not apply this line of reasoning to Islam’s destruction of old Sumerian, Buddhist, and Hindu stuff. Attempting to erase history is one of the most reality-denying things you can do.

      It kills me that most “pagan” metalheads, especially those in the U.S., are a bunch of PC sissies. Do they really think the coming SJW caliphate is going to let them keep their mjollnir necklaces? You’d assume that after the first time antifa tried to shut down a Moonsorrow show, the “pagan metal hordes 666” would wake up, but most of them are still Berniebros.

      1. Ludvig B.B (vOddy) says:

        YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

        Hatred and intolerance until death. Never yield!

      2. Rainer Weikusat says:

        One of the most ‘metal’ statements I’ve encountered so far (in a band interview in a long-dead fanzine) was »Fresst nicht alles, was man euch vorsetzt (vor allem keinen gelben Schnee)«. Literally translated, this would be »Don’t eat everything someone puts on the table for you (especially not yellow snow)«. The meaning is (in case this isn’t clear) Don’t be someone else’s useful idiot.

    3. Slowly We Frot says:

      ODB… Are you from the olddisgruntledbastard.org?!
      I think I’ve gathered, from that site, that you’re an Indian metalhead, in India. Is that true?

  4. Alternatives 2 Madness says:

    The best songs on Realms of Incessant Bloodshed are >>>

    Rectal Pointillism
    Pectoral Reductionalism
    Littoral Criticizms
    Pugilistic Onanizm

  5. Warfather is an utter disappointment and a mega blemish on Steve Tucker. The new Morbid Angel is looking just as bleak as it was when David Vincent was in the band. Trey should just quit at this point. I read in an interview where Tucker was talking about how death metal isn’t dead, but yet he only provides examples that it is dead in his own music! What a farce. To think that they can recapture the good Tucker era Morbid Angel (which is almost two decades ago) is foolishness. Morbid Angel is not much different than Miss Cleo now; a ruse capitalizing off of the innocent souls who once held MA in high esteem.

    1. Rainer Weikusat says:

      I don’t quite follow this logic. The lone Warfather song available via bandcamp does not make me want to hear more from the band. That’s a mid-tempo track which seems composed of boilerplate death metal rifflets and drummlets with no discernible (to me) relation to other which don’t conveny any sense of moving into some direction beyond aimlessly circling around each other. There’s a dull solo constructed from consonant harmonies and even devoid of any noteworthy technical proficiency. Altogether, this really sounds like a bunch of bored session players asked to do “a death metal”, very much resembling the cover art it its uninspired and unispiring usualness.

      But how does “Steve Tucker is a member of a completely bland band” translate to “Trey should just quit as this point”?

  6. Deport All Hipsters says:

    The art is as usual bad, but I wonder what a SMR focused on cover art would look like.

    1. C.M. says:

      The Sewercide cover is actually kind of cool. Reminds me of Nespithe or Psychostasia. I like that borderline-cartoonish LSD alien-monster look. Mental Funeral’s cover especially rules. Too often nowadays it’s all about the computer-generated abstract bullshit. That doesn’t fit death metal at all.

      1. Can you survive the blitzkrieg says:

        I must be out of the loop because it’s all hand drawn “old skool” mimicry that I’ve seen, for years, anyways thanks site, I do t care about metal anymore past bad reviews and some classic albums, was this the goal all along?

      2. Johan P says:

        Seconded. Red-ish pink is the best colour for abstract-but-fleshy death metal. Haven’t heard this album though.

        Other examples of hilariously demented pink album covers, anyone?

        Massacre – From Beyond popped up in my mind.

        1. Alternatives 2 Madness says:

          Here’s another hilariously demented pink album cover:
          “The Sunbather” by Deafheaven
          “Bloodthirst” by Cannibal Corpse
          “Master of Puppets” by Metallica
          “Don’t Break the Oath” by Mercyful Fate

          1. Johan P says:

            Voivod have lots of these, Phobos, Negatron, Dimension Hatröss…

            How about:

          2. C.M. says:

            What about Deathcrush?

            1. Alternatives 2 Madness says:

              What about Deathcrush? At that rate, what about ‘The Red in the Sky is Ours’, or ‘Nespithe’?!

              No, nigga; that colour is called ‘red’.

        2. Brown noise says:

          Pink metal should be its own genre.

          1. Pink circles are best with a splash of brown.

    2. Cockrock lover says:

      That Sorcery cover isn`t bad either, it could easily be a King Diamond cover.

      1. C.M. says:

        Gives me a strong Member of Immortal Damnation vibe.

  7. Can you survive the blitzkrieg says:

    I dot

  8. “This is a different scene with different people and different music,” Leyja says. “Nostalgia is bullshit.” While diverse, the bands of Atlanta’s metal underground have speed, dexterity, and monstrous growls in common, from the Norwegian sophistication of Disfigurement’s

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