The metal community has always defended itself against poseurs, with most of us realizing that hipsters, scenesters and other groups are varieties of poseur.

What is a poseur? Someone who pretends for the social status of being seen in a hip group. Metal, as it turns out, has authenticity because we are actual rebels, not rock ‘n’ rollers singing protest songs to give legitimacy to their pursuit of hedonism.

Hipsters, poseurs and scenesters are threatening because they are insincere. They adopt a musical genre to make themselves look cool, and in the process sabotaging it by bring it to a lowest common denominator of attention-getting behavior.

This guts the genre from within. The spirit that made it authentic has been replaced with the same trashy plastic advertising that covers everything else. The genre then becomes absorbed by the same old stuff, which is itself a mishmash of whatever has sold records over the past five generations.

Perhaps the best definition of hipster — the mishmash left over when a civilization fails — comes to us from AdBusters magazine:

Ever since the Allies bombed the Axis into submission, Western civilization has had a succession of counter-culture movements that have energetically challenged the status quo. Each successive decade of the post-war era has seen it smash social standards, riot and fight to revolutionize every aspect of music, art, government and civil society.

But after punk was plasticized and hip hop lost its impetus for social change, all of the formerly dominant streams of “counter-culture” have merged together. Now, one mutating, trans-Atlantic melting pot of styles, tastes and behavior has come to define the generally indefinable idea of the “Hipster.”

An artificial appropriation of different styles from different eras, the hipster represents the end of Western civilization – a culture lost in the superficiality of its past and unable to create any new meaning. Not only is it unsustainable, it is suicidal. While previous youth movements have challenged the dysfunction and decadence of their elders, today we have the “hipster” – a youth subculture that mirrors the doomed shallowness of mainstream society.

But even that captures what hipsters are now, not the simple fact that they are an old archetype going back to The Enlightenment. The Bohemians of the 1900s, the rebels of the 1600s, and the giggin’ hipsters of the 2010s have some things in common: deliberately unconventional behavior, focus on ironism and uniqueness at an aesthetic level, and hedonistic lifestyles at the expense of the rest of us.

New York Magazine has more on the history of the hipster:

The hipster, however, was someone else already. Specifically, he was a black subcultural figure of the late forties, best anatomized by Anatole Broyard in an essay for the Partisan Review called “A Portrait of the Hipster.” A decade later, the hipster had evolved into a white subcultural figure. This hipster—and the reference here is to Norman Mailer’s “The White Negro” essay for Dissent in 1957—was explicitly defined by the desire of a white avant-garde to disaffiliate itself from whiteness, with its stain of Eisenhower, the bomb, and the corporation, and achieve the “cool” knowledge and exoticized energy, lust, and violence of black Americans. (Hippie itself was originally an insulting diminutive of hipster, a jab at the sloppy kids who hung around North Beach or Greenwich Village after 1960 and didn’t care about jazz or poetry, only drugs and fun.)

The hipster, in both black and white incarnations, in his essence had been about superior knowledge—what Broyard called “a priorism.” He insisted that hipsterism was developed from a sense that minorities in America were subject to decisions made about their lives by conspiracies of power they could never possibly know. The hip reaction was to insist, purely symbolically, on forms of knowledge that they possessed before anyone else, indeed before the creation of positive knowledge—a priori.

This leads us to wonder: why are hipsters so omnipresent, if they are transparent? Hipsters seek others who are either clueless or equally dependent on not mentioning the fakeness of hipsterism. Like drug addicts clustering, or cult members in their caverns, hipsters seek out people they can manipulate, control and influence.

The New York Times gives us a glimpse into the psychology of the hipster:

All hipsters play at being the inventors or first adopters of novelties: pride comes from knowing, and deciding, what’s cool in advance of the rest of the world. Yet the habits of hatred and accusation are endemic to hipsters because they feel the weakness of everyone’s position — including their own. Proving that someone is trying desperately to boost himself instantly undoes him as an opponent. He’s a fake, while you are a natural aristocrat of taste. That’s why “He’s not for real, he’s just a hipster” is a potent insult among all the people identifiable as hipsters themselves.

With all that being said, would you want this self-important psychology and fake social scene to invade your genre? This question weighs heavily on metalheads as SJWs emerge as the newest form of hipster, combining the demands for personal hedonism with a Communist-derived insistence that others subsidize it through tolerance and, ultimately, actual subsidies. It’s not surprising that many hipsters exist on an equal diet of trust funds and food stamps.

SJWs want to have the hipster psychology take over heavy metal, and while they claim it is for political reasons, the real reason is much simpler: they want to fill the room with people they can control, manipulate and influence by excluding anyone who is a realist, or has a complex worldview, or adheres to traditional heavy metal ideals. SJWs want to destroy our standards and replace them with their own so that, in the new chaos, they can keep the genre filled with clueless people who won’t point out the obvious.

That SJWs are just giggin’ hipsters.

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19 thoughts on “Hipsters”

  1. I blew my head off like Per Ohlin says:

    The guys at Metal Sucks are the biggest hipsters I’ve come across.

  2. Dualist says:

    Spot-on, as usual. That croquet pic made me think of a nice anti-hipster activity people may enjoy (while having a nice relaxing pipe and a quality real ale, if you like):


    No, NOT pool. We’re talking a table that’s 6 feet WIDE and 12 long. Most pool tables would fit into the bottom corner of a snooker table. It’s a game of exquisite skill.

    For those of us who appreciate the higher, more dignified values of the past it’s about the last sport/game still played were the players still have a sense of honour. It’s actually common, even in the World Championships, for the referee to miss a foul and the player, absolutley without exception, WILL OWN UP TO IT HIMSELF (maybe losing a hundred grand in the process.)

    Here’s a random match:


    (Rules: Pot a red then a colour, repeat till all the reds gone then pot colours in ascending order of points ie. yellow, green. brown, blue, pink, black. The ultimate is to play a game potting only reds and blacks, this gives the legendary break (ie. score in one visit) of 147. It’s only been televised about ten times in history. Here’s somebody making it look easy:


    For those who prefer their pastimes more war-like, check out rugby league (it’s like American football but with hard men). No hipster has yet been seen at a match:


    1. I blew my head off like Per Ohlin says:

      Man I used to watch Snooker on the BBC when there wasn’t much on other channels.
      Last time I watched it was when Mark Selby was champion.

      If you want some class, I recommend watching some good old Test match Cricket.

    2. Anthony says:

      I was all ready to hate on your post big time for talking about poncy sports, but that snooker video was actually really engrossing. Seems like I just clicked on the link, and I’m already nearly an hour into it.

      1. LordKrumb says:

        If you can, I suggest playing a game of snooker in order to get a feel for how difficult it is to play competently (compared to pool) — then watching professional matches becomes even more exciting.

        1. Dualist says:

          Definitely. The angle the camera looks down at the table makes it seem MUCH smaller than it really is. If you get to play (if they have billiards tables in the US they’re the same size as snooker) it will really make you start to realise just how skillful the top players are. Even potting a single ball isn’t straightforward but the real skill is in making the cue ball land inch-perfect after travelling 15 feet and bouncing off two cushions. Some of Ronnie’s 147’s are just poetry in motion.

  3. Martin Jacobsen says:

    “With all that being said, would you want this self-important psychology and fake social scene to invade your genre? This question weighs heavily on metalheads as SJWs emerge as the newest form of hipster, combining the demands for personal hedonism with a Communist-derived insistence that others subsidize it through tolerance and, ultimately, actual subsidies. It’s not surprising that many hipsters exist on an equal diet of trust funds and food stamps.”

    Superior analysis; precise articulation. This is very well done.

  4. militant says:

    We need to resurrect 80s Exodus and kick their asses at every show until they realize metal isn’t fucking satire and is not for them.

    Personally, I target them for pit sodomy every chance I get.

    But thats blockheaded right?

    1. Anthony says:

      Exodus didn’t really become a joke until their second album. I’d wager that Bonded by Blood is about as anti-poser as you can get. TesatMEHnt, on the other hand…

      1. militant says:


        by ‘their’ I meant the hipsters

        why would i beat up 80s Exodus lol

  5. OliveFox says:

    Every show i’ve been to in the last 5 years has been infiltrated by hipsters in my area…ottobar, 930, Ramshead, Blackcat. Even Slayer at the Fillmore Silver Spring. I was told that Deathfest the last few years has been fucked as well, though I haven’t been in a long while.

    I don’t give a fuck if hipsters continue making and championing shitty music….that is easy to ignore. But why do I have to choose between 19 fucking “craft” IPA’s and natty boh at my old beloved rock clubs? Hipster garbage. Why do smoke breaks at a metal show with strangers now turn into discussions on trendy blogs instead of the best tool for dye threading compressor pipe or planing an oak table top? “Academic” Hipsters.

    Maybe this opinion straddles a different type of line, but as far as live metal goes, once blue collar men stopped going out to support good bands, the hipsters swooped in and ruined many perfectly good rock clubs. Pantera and Metallica fans probably give a bad image to working class metalheads, but if you haven’t circled up with a bunch of mechanics with homemade Absurd and Chaos 88 patches sown to their crappy leather jackets, you haven’t lived.

    1. Dualist says:

      I agree. Working-class people are just less pretentious and more honest. That’s why I mentioned Rugby League too. It is only played by working class fellas in the Northern towns and cities. Maybe that’s why in soccer the players are constantly throwing themselves on the floor when they get tackled and pretending to be injured whereas the rugby guys go the whole game pretending NOT to be injured.

      There was a Warrington player last year who ruptured his TESTICLE at the start of the match. He actually played the rest off the match before going to hospital to have it removed….! Superhuman. No shoulder pads unlike in American Football, either.

      People probably think I’m being naive suggesting these activities are somehow a rebellion against hipsterism. But I think when young people take up things like rugby it gives them a path to form manly virtues that will stay with them for the rest of their lives. Similar to the way you rarely find hipsters in the Army.

      We all know liberals don’t really care about the rights of gay people (because they don’t really care about anything). So their OBSESSIVE promotion of gay culture must be for another reason. It’s simply because they want to erode those masculine values that have always been the bedrock of traditionalist societies.

      1. OliveFox says:

        Spot on. I have a two year old boy and I can already see how rough it is going to be for him to “become a man,” as it were. Television, radio, school, whatever it is, sends a zillion mixed messages to young males especially. Become an emasculated push over because your testosterone is dangerous and makes you a violent rapist…except in that rare exception that the pussy is in peril, than use your masculine instincts to protect it all costs; exercise, don’t eat junk food and don’t count the girls out in sports…except don’t bully, don’t hit a defenseless receiver, drink Bud and NEVER hit a girl; you can do anything, you are special, your potential is limitless…oh yeah, you’re white, so your success is bringing down other races.

        But, despite society’s corroding and near omnipotent array of hypocritical views, the traditional family unit is older, stronger, and wiser.

        On a lighter note, my sons two word review of Atom by Atom was “no, daddy!” Clearly it isn’t heavy enough for him, Suffocation time!

      2. I blew my head off like Per Ohlin says:

        Do you play Rugby?

        1. Dualist says:

          Yes, Rugby League. My late grandfather was a professional as was my uncle, too. It’s quite a different game to the better-known rugby Union. Quicker, more skillful, many more tackles per game. Check out the Super League on youtube if you get chance.

          1. I blew my head off like Per Ohlin says:

            I don’t follow it but I have watched a few games of Union and League. I’m more of a cricket fan in all honesty.
            You play for a team?

    2. Anthony says:

      oy vey goyim your antisemtic hate bands are aggravating my asthma

  6. Yar says:

    What annoys me most about SJW hipsters is that they infest anything and everything. The media, politics, metal, games, anime/manga, horror, sci-fi, even websites that just post news on upcoming DVD/Blu-ray releases and the occasional review, such as this one: http://www.dvdactive.com/reviews/dvd/avengers-age-of-ultron.html (Check out the exchange in the comment section between MarvDwight, mlcm, and Gabe Powers)

    The infestation must be purged.

    1. Dualist says:

      Shit, I’ve read it, man:

      ‘the fact that you’re using regressive buzzwords like ‘PC’ and ‘shoehorn’ makes me think there’s no point in discussing this further, because you aren’t actually interested in understanding the issue. Diversity for ‘it’s own sake’ is great. It reflects a changing world, leads to more interesting stories, and much MUCH more important in the grand scheme of society as a whole than any tent-pole superhero movie. There’s zero question. It’s ridiculous to think otherwise. ‘

      So tolerant…

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