We knew many of the newer metal fans were absolute wankers, but an Austin masturbator wearing a Darkthrone shirt has hit the news:
The man entered the store, selected some items, then went to the dressing room. APD says he left the curtain open while he pleasured himself and was indecently exposed.”
The man is described as a white male around 30 years old with a large build. He also has a reddish beard and mustache.
First, does he not know of CCTV everywhere? Second, can he even name a Darkthrone album before Panzerfaust? We should ask him what his Reddit username is.
Tags: austin, darkthrone, masturbation
Men’s shorts keep getting shorter. Preppy shit.
You’ve got it backwards pal. Baggy shorts got popular in the mid-late 90s due to the influence of hip-hop fashion and nu-metal. Look at any photo of frat boys from roughly 97-2010 and they’ll all be wearing past the knee khaki cargo shorts.
super short cutoff jean shorts (aka Daisy Dudes) are the choice of the discerning metalhead. Bonus points if the pockets hang out below the actual short leg.
Will the necroclassical podcast ever return??
Non-cutoff shorts and crocs = confirmed poser
Black Metal has been the normies’ choice for XTREME Metal for years now.
Death Metal is still too Metal for these lefturd faggots.
Christ be praised.
Scuse me? The normie type that used to be into scene music like hardcore punk and stoner octopus tattoo batista stoner bands has overtaken death metal n made it safe faggoty boutique stoner core with no soul. Of course the linneage of what is good survives but it is lost in a sea of shite it will go away but shiiiit death metal is utterly trendy and normalized now.
You are the only scene there is so don’t go fagging it up.
Harder than anything dark throne has done in years
Look at that fat oaty poof, no wonder they reported him.
But one sight of a Manowarrior on duty in that dressing room and the young wet sales assistant in her prime would have shut the whole store down just to get a single peek of his sheathed steel.
Hail Manowar.
Hey it’s Karl Logan. Didn’t know they let you guys use the internet now.
“fat oaty poof” has me laughing repeatedly.
Still, I remain unswayed on the MQ.
Panzerfaust? Don’t you mean any album other than A Blaze in The Northern Sky? Most casuals probably don’t even know Panzerfaust exists.
Darkthrone and Satyricon are the biggest let downs in norwegian black metal.
Ulver and Satyricon, you say?
Ulver is right up there.
I like Darkthrone, but the album I listen to the most is the first one. I did not expect that. Ulver is a commercial horror on par with Cradle of Filth, Cannibal Corpse, Opeth, Pantera, later Meshuggah, etc.
Fenriz’s heart is probably in the right place. He wants to teach the kids about Jag Panzer, Manowar, punk, crossover thrash etc. There’s no reason to do it as Darkthrone in such a clumsy and self-referential way however. Isn’t he a DJ?
His goal 16 years past relevancy, there was some type of 2nd wind for metal starting in the late 2000s and people wanted to know more while being deep off into metal was still some type of skill with value. The current generation is unworthy while previous have turned into failures. No more music now, people and society needs to die off. Only a cataclysm with mass casualties can get me excited these days, a show or album seems pathetic at this point, like a child with an action figure.. The new generation will have to re-develop society, the less they know of this one the better.
Bot
Maybe the man was an honest expression of nowadays Darkthrone, if so he should be commended, and taken out for some good old fashion fistin’
If it was Ledney doing the cumming it would’ve been considered the most normal thing in the world.
Protip niggaz, Darkthrone was always for the erm “neurodivergent.” Whether it’s the autistic repulsion of novelty or the social credit seeking hipsters, no nominally functional human gives any fuck about what they do. Forced debacle is forced and all the SOP humans for which I speak move on with life as is the only way to do anything yet here I am engaging regardless. May the devil bless my incursion. Darkthroating was never good.
What a bloated husk of a man wearing a darkthrone tshirt.
Just like the darkthrone of today.
My top 10 best vocalists in no order:
1 Ledney
2 David Vincent
3 King Diamond
4 Masse Broberg
5 Nocturno Culto
6 MkM
7 Ozzy
8 Glen Benton
9 Marko Laiho
10 Tom Angelripper
This is relevant, because even though guitars are more important, flowing vocally with the instrumental energy amplifies the experience.
/thread
This is the average dipshit who listens to black metal. All of you are exactly like this loser.
Right, so listening to Cradle of Filth = bad, listening to Immortal = good, that’s the logic of this site, when in fact all of it is unbelievably gay.
I’m genuinely glad when I see normies disliking extreme metal because if there’s any hope for the genre to come out with more quality releases (instead of only 1-3 good releases every year), it needs to vastly thin its herd and be hated again.
Black metal in particular was initially supposed to be something for secluded elitists (non-normies), but then like with anything, it started sucking ass when it became popular.
You took the black metal audience and added a few thousand percent more people, and those people wanted Cradle of Filth, Opeth, Pantera, Meshuggah, DSBM, emo, hardcore, and Pink Floyd tinged black metal… so you got moron music because it is profitable. Always follow the money. This principle never fails.
If you take 99% of all the metal ever released, I will assure you what you already know that the music is so incredibly abysmal it makes your typical Jon Lajoie style radio friendly song look like a masterpiece. A good example would be the “Atmospheric black metal albums” youtube channel, for all your castrative sonic hipsterdom needs.
(good metal is better than pop music, but bad metal is worse than pop music)
My way of rebelling against the “post-metal” age is to just only download music as opposed to buying it, avoid shows that have metalheads in them and dress normally. To anyone who wants to get into metal and even start a band today my message would be: please stand in front of an approaching japanese bullet train, and have a great day!
There was natural selection in force in the underground. Then in came the Redditors who wanted to compete with each other by having the most obscure band, so they rationalized quality onto bands that were droning garbage just so the Redditor could one-up his buddies at the local corporate dive bar. Natural selection was reversed. Parallels to the fall of Rome and Chichen Itza are wholly accurate.
Couple of things to clarify, I’m an older millenial (age 44), not Gen X, but merely adjacent. My “job” is video-game development, even though I’m rich as fuck I only do it to fill the void. I don’t make woke games though, I make the good shit, like Underrail 2, Grim Dawn and Voin.
Why am I saying this? Because you can’t put everything in a box, there are nuances, not everything is a goddamn wojak meme. This is why Christianity is a fucking mess, it’s a failed reflection of the true God.
might be because im so strikingly beautiful with a massive aura, but if i feel like rocking a longsleeve, i do it, and if a bunch of strangers think i have mad style and must be cool as fuck and a few tell me i look like a rockstar and some idiot in a behemoth shirt wants to talk rotting christ, well i guess i can live with that.
also what shows are you going to that don’t have any overt metalheads hanging around lol sounds fucking gay
I agree.
This is not a trimmed and lean aryan killing machine.
Five mile forced marches daily, with packs containing poseur heads.
A good start for alot of bloated looking husks…
Fenriz probably likes jeet pussy, the only type of pussy he can get. That, or he fucks reindeer pussy, because there is nothing else to fuck where he lives.
Plenty of hot Scandinavian women