Ordo Ab Chao

As an insanely vicious and memorable chapter of metal’s oldest website comes to a chaotic climax, a new order now dawns upon us.  Contrary to the leftist hysteria over the net-neutrality laws passed last week, the internet is still alive, and therefore Death Metal Underground continues its quest to conquer its cyber niche and restore prestige to a genre fallen from grace.  Once again, Death Metal Underground will undergo a vast metamorphosis in lieu of the changing times while still remaining true to its purpose in the metal information sphere.

Although the music industry has collapsed, the money has disappeared, a fierce culture war continues, the heavy music media has been corrupted, and metal remains stuck in the longest creative rut since its inception 47 years ago, a new team of leaders and young writers emerges to reap the oncoming storm.  We will continue to document the decline of metal and decisively strike down what perverts its core being.  But we will also maintain a bold, innovative, and optimistic outlook for the future of metal, working diligently toward discovering and cultivating the next great era of the genre.

It is highly likely that I will become the most hated editor this site has ever known.   But I can assure you that, under my tenure, we will present you with the darkest and ugliest truths of metal’s pasts and present, challenge all conventions that have become tired or trendy, provide thoughtful, honest, well cultured coverage of ALL heavy music, and wage cultural warfare against the forces of ad-slaved indie metal.  Much like our political system and mainstream media- the metal underground music industry is a swamp.  Therefore it must be drained and destroyed, and must be done so with logic and reason.  To do so effectively, this requires a bold foray into the mainstream of heavy music- one that is undesired, but necessary to survive in the harsh climate of this age.

But that’s not all that’s to come- beyond the writers and chief editor, a new aristocracy of DMU overlords has also risen in the shadows in the form of managers and content editors.  This has supremacy has been established to restore order to this once proud space and tighten our grip on the flow of metal information.  There most certainly is room for those who are worthy, but such worth must be proven, as deception is abound and few are able to survive.  We will reward the strong, and discard the weak, and reward the uppermost echelons to those who succeed.

So if you’re a writer who has started (or is thinking of starting) a small metal blog/site, I implore you- contact us and write articles in a place where people are actually going to see them. If you are a die hard metal head with a superior IQ, strong organization skills, and a loyalty to this site and its principles- there is a place for you should you contact us.  For everyone else: death is only the beginning.

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14 thoughts on “Ordo Ab Chao”

  1. Incontinence says:

    I look forward to senpai Exilarch’s insights of the metal abyss. Maybe we can learn something from sleeping on the floor. Blue-eyed Mormon gods storm the phenomenal world and the demiurge drowns forever in their wake! Hails Mormon brethen! Take the Earth as your own and copulate with women in the kingdom!

    Stick a fork in me and this site.

    1. Maarat says:

      Blue-eyed Aryan Godz of War from ancient Hindustans projecting themselves astrally toward new worlds through of will of the Jehovah hivemind. All will fertilize the xenomorphic queen with their growing pale Aryan sperm depositorz and bring forth new life unto their worlds as similar to Aryan-Irish Michael Fassbender in Alien: Covenant.

    2. Frederick Dinkledick says:

      He is an Opeth weaboo who only pretends to like metal for “The Cause”.

      Remember this, guys?

      And the cycle begins again.

  2. Death metal as philosophy says:

    I have sent an application and I am still waiting for a reply PS not real email address

  3. Deathevokation says:

    Toner writes, “Much like our political system and mainstream media- the metal underground music industry is a swamp. Therefore it must be drained and destroyed, and must be done so with logic and reason. To do so effectively, this requires a bold foray into the mainstream of heavy music- one that is undesired, but necessary to survive in the harsh climate of this age.” Translation: Deathmetal.org is gonna review garbage metal, which they’ve already been doing throughout the site and in Sadistic Reviews, and bash it further. Of course they’ll do it with logic and reason, but the underlying key is to stir controversy in a social media world where the loudest, and not necessarily intelligent complaints, bring clicks to a site out of ideas other than regurgitating the mainstream. Does this mean that hipsters visiting the site for advice on beard oils, beard grooming, pipe tobacco, and beer will become so alienated they can’t sip Samuel Smith’s while listening to Myrkur? As for the reference to draining the swamp, Trump isn’t draining the swamp. He and his billionaire stock shareholder pals are the swamp. Like Uncle Tom Obama and his globalist president predecessors, Trump never met a Zionist Jew central banker whose cock he won’t blow before putting them into his cabinet fresh from Goldman Sachs. Regarding net neutrality, and the fake news link provided to CNN, sure the internet works, but that doesn’t mean you won’t get charged by huge corporations for specific content or that they won’t clamp down even further on the First Amendment. Therefore, deathmetal.org had better create content worth reading. Enjoy the mainstream.

    1. gorgeous georg wilhelm freidrich says:

      so edgy…

  4. Jared Kushner says:

    Truth. We Jews are turning Superman’s Empire inside out!

  5. neutronhammer says:

    Please let Maraat do the SMRs, i hope you bear in mind, the WEAK need SODOMIZING

  6. Deathevokation says:

    You guys gotta stick with the program. Do reviews of Pallbearer and Perfect Circle to go with the one recently posted for Ministry. More ads on the pages so it’ll barely load no matter the internet speed. I wanna see ads all over based on my viewing history. It’s a commission based world you fucking faggots. Sell, sell, sell.

  7. 1917 or Die says:

    The Internet will keep working for you as your dressing up as rebels doesn’t hide very well the fact that your upholding of “loyalty”, “courage” etc is exactly the kind of mentality the system needs to breed cannon fodder for the 3rd world war that’s coming (and Clinton would have made it come just as well as Trump).

    The bits about metal, how it’s played, inspired or sold are great, but you should stick to that.

  8. Skull Powder says:

    Tip: links to email addresses in an html “a” tag should be prefixed with “mailto:”, as in “mailto:media@deathmetal.org”.

  9. Recarbonize says:

    poop dick shit laser

  10. Jared Kushner says:

    The Thantifaxath review was mainstream pandering goy. I bet Brock hasn’t listened to half the albums here:

    1. Reduced Without Any Effort says:

      That article at the very least focused on the musical qualities of the release (as well as specifically where it was lacking and what could be done differently), which is a major step above almost any other review as of late, and far more in keeping with why people used to read this site than garbage SMRs.

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