Tom Warrior Censored on Upcoming Celtic Frost Reissues

In a recent blog post, Celtic Frost vocalist/guitarist Tom G. Warrior has publicly disowned BMG’s upcoming double CD reissues of his band’s best output, Morbid Tales and To Mega Therion, and the more pandering and spotty Into the Pandemonium and Vanity / Nemesis. The embarrassing Cold Lake was omitted at Warrior’s request. While initially on board with the reissues and involved with the creative process, Tom Warrior has abandoned ship because the commercial mega-label BMG refused to print his linear notes as he intended. This blatant censorship was a means of preserving the integrity of the Noise Records liquid assets purchased by the label but had inadvertently overwhelmed the Cold Laker with a plethora of painful flashbacks of the corporate influence that plagued Celtic Frost throughout its existence.

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Bestial Evil Paying to Play with Angelcorpse

Social justice warrior deathcore band Bestial Evil are one of the seven openers for Angelcorpse at a pay to play show in Washington, DC tonight. Yes this is the same Bestial Evil you think it is, the antifascist and antiracist and probably Black Lives Matter supporting deathcore band whose antics and temper tantrums have been covered on Death Metal Underground Past. This time Bestial Evil, despite their antifascist stance, are opening for Angelcorpse. The bassist and vocalist of Angelcorpse is none other than Order From Chaos front man, existential social Darwinist and author of The Conqueror Manifesto Pete Helmkamp.

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New Suffocation Record “Put Together Right on the Spot”

In a recent promotional video for Suffocation‘s upcoming not so great album …Of the Dark Light, frontman Frank Mullen admitted that since the band members live all over the place and not in one centralized area, have lives outside of Suffocation, and don’t really practice as much anymore “so a lot of stuff was put together kinda like right on the spot.” Rhythm guitarist Charlie Errigo said “It’s like a videogame. It’s like each riff is a level and you got that hard riff that’s the boss.”

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Deconstructing USBM’s Deviation from the Golden Path

As America’s conservative renaissance thrives through its flourishing Alt Right movement, the time is ripe for a full fledged rebirth of its black metal identity.

With the genre having reached rock bottom in recent years due to pop punk and screamo influences, beta male journalism, communist ideologies, and a faux transcendentalist philosophy, we can begin to right the ship by exhuming and examining the cadaver of its formative age.

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Brown-Forman Corporation – Gentleman Jack

Every once in awhile us vile black metal badasses need to suit up. Maybe it’s to please a family member at a wedding, maybe it’s to respect the dead at a funeral, maybe it’s because the soul was sold to embrace the nihilistic corporate world once sworn against (ugh). Nevertheless, life in the first world necessitates this occasional cleaner cut image and perhaps this projection may even impress some strangers in open territory. But deep down underneath this fabrication lurks that sadistic primal savage that lusts for chaos, destruction, and pure fucking mayhem.

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Destruction North American 2017 Tour

Destruction are touring the US this year. The not as legendary as Sodom German speed metal band are bringing along z-list death metal bands Warbringer and Jungle Rot. Do people who love Sodom, Destructor, and Kreator love Jungle Rot? How many middle-aged men and party thrashers in Suicidal Tendencies hats also wear cargo shorts? Seeing this tour gives you the chance to find out. Will Schmier’s voice be as haggard as his appearance? Will Destruction’s drums be as fake as modern Kreator’s?

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Ripper Planning Euro Trip

Two of the best and only worthy modern speed metal bands are embarking upon a European tour together this fall. Ripper and Entrench, who made our lists of The Best Underground Metal of 2014 and 2016, are planning a European tour and need to get some gigs to knock headbangers on their backs. From Ripper’s Funbook page:

RIPPER announces first European Tour together with Swedish Thrashers of ENTRENCH!

Interested promoters please get in touch with Roadmaster Booking.

Available dates between September 15 and 30.
Booking via contact@roadmasterbooking.com

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More Free Press for Shining

Swedish emo black ‘n’ roll pop punk band Shining has been kicked off a show in the fat hipster junkie haven of Portland, leaving the funderground’s communist media pussies and useless indie rock blogs abuzz about “alleged” acts of shock rock front man Kvarforth. Though not charged with a crime at this time, the self mutilating schizophrenic man kisser has been accused of “violent, racist, sexist, nazi behavior,” completing the full checklist of character assassinations attempted by the left on a daily basis. But apparently unbeknownst to all of these out of touch basement-dwelling butt rock journalists this is the exact GG-Allin LARPing Kvarforth has been doing at every single show and in every single interview for over two decades. Therefore, this mass collusion has accomplished nothing outside of promoting Shining and their upcoming tour dates.

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