Lucky Charms Metal

Death Metal Underground has received criticism for our review of limp-wristed, warmed-over Swedish heavy metal act In Flames. Our staff called them the Swedish version of Christian glam rock band Stryper. However despite being hard rock, Stryper were actually heavier, more sincere in purpose, and more aggressive than the Comic Sans In Flames. Stryper and the speed metal influenced glam rock of Skid Row were at least far more musical than Fredrik Nordstrom produced melodeaf such as post-Alf Svensson At the Gates, Arch Enemy, Dark Tranquility, In Flames, and Soilwork. Stryper and Skid Row were at least well-versed in 60s and 70s riff rock while directly influenced by Metallica and Slayer:

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Hail of Bullets Breaks Up

Funderground party death ‘n’ roll and deathcore band Hail of Bullets has broken up according to a post on their Funbook page. Hail of Bullets’ illness was no reason to exist as a musical entity beyond lining the pockets and fattening the livers of Dutch death metal scene veterans through CD releases and festival gigs. Martin van Drunen quit the train wreck a while ago probably as death metal fans grew sick of the band’s constant stream of lame releases. The war is over Hail of Bullets. You lost and were executed for your crimes against metal music such as III: The Rommel Chronicles.

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Upcoming New Issue of Isten

A new issue of the legendary Isten fanzine is being published later this year by Svart Records. Those foresighted enough to have purchased the Isten Fanzine: Don’t Break the Ghost compilation book will know how big of a deal this is. Isten was one of the most legendary death and black zines along with Metalion’s Slayer.

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Necrophobic 2017 Chilean Tour

Swedish black metal band Necrophobic is planning a short four show tour of Chile this June. Chilean fans should check them out especially as their best vocalist, Anders Strokirk off of The Nocturnal Silence, has rejoined the band. Hopefully they will play their best, early material.

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Upcomming Rotting Christ Vinyl Reissues

All of Rotting Christ‘s back catalog is being reissued on vinyl by Peaceville Records starting with their second release and first studio album, Thy Mighty Contract on April 21st. Hack writer Dayal Patterson of Black Metal: Evolution of the Cult is writing liner notes along with bang co-founder Sakis Tolis. A box set of all of their releases, including the ones nobody wants, will be released later this year.

Kaeck’s Het zwarte diktaat Is Coming

Kaeck, whose Stormkult was The Best Underground Metal Release of 2015, announced on their Facebook page that a new album entitled Het zwarte diktaat (The Black Notes) is being written for release on Folter Records later this year.

Sadistic Metal Reviews: 3-9-2017

The Death Metal Underground staff subjects themselves to countless nights of toilet diving in order to bring you gems crapped out by the dessicated undead corpse of the music industry. These are what we left in the latrine.

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Anders Björler Quits At the Gates

Anders Björler has quit At the Gates according to a statement posted on the band’s Facebook page. Nevertheless At the Gates is pressing forward with more new, lame material that nobody wants to hear as it won’t match the band’s prime period headed by Alf Svensson capped by Gardens of Grief and The Red in the Sky is Ours. Nobody was particularly fond of At War With Reality. The rest of At the Gates should join Alf Svensson and Anders Bjorler in throwing in the towel for good.

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Welsh University Wages War on Men to “Embrace Cultural Diversity”

Cardiff Metropolitan University has banned the use of of English words that it considers masculine in order to “embrace cultural diversity”. Every single word in the English language with “man” in it is now banned due to social justice warriors, communists, and feminists waging war against masculinity and wishing to neuter all mankind into mediocrity. Violaters of Newspeak face academic discipline and expulsion.

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