MetalSucks Threatens Hells Headbangers

Crybaby social justice warrior metalcore blog MetalSucks posted a statement from a group of metalcore musicians calling for American distro and label Hells Headbangers to stop releasing “Nazi propaganda”or else.

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Death Yell Premiere “Soulless” From Upcoming Descent Into Hell

Chilean death metal band Death Yell premiered a new track off their upcoming debut album Descent Into Hell, which comes out in August on Hells Headbangers. “Soulless” is an unremarkable but inoffensive riff salad. I don’t remember anything about five minutes after listening to it twice other than it reminded me more of Teutonic speed metal than death metal. The album probably won’t be that great and Death Yell will probably end up opening for other Chilean bands such as Pentagram (Chile), Ripper or Unaussprechlichen Kulten.

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White Death – White Death (2017)

White Death turn black metal into pop rock on their self-titled album, White Death, for scenesters who want to be tough and are mad that black metal songwriting was based melodic narratives instead of hooky pop-singalongs like Gothenburg metal. White Death aim to reach out to that group of scenesters who used to shop at Hot Topic back when they were teenagers. White Death even have an edgy Finnish nationalist theme to go with their generic, non-descript Satanism! Scenesters don’t have to want to send the world back to the Dark Ages anymore, they can just drink beer for the evil and chant sing-alongs about the 5’3 Simo Häyhä shooting hundreds of frost-bitten Ivans! Wait White Death’s lyrics are not even about the Winter War, just generic mall Satanism; the Auntie Anne’s Pretzels of evil.

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Midnight – Shox of Violence (2017)

Midnight are the definition of beer metal. Midnight sound like Motorhead if Motorhead accidentally took tranquilizers and forgot to write chord progressions and progressive minor-key heavy metal leads in their songs. Midnight are Motorhead if when Lemmy got arrested for drug possession in Canada in the early seventies while touring with Hawkwind, Lemmy did not merely get kicked out of Hawkwind and deported back to the United Kingdom; Midnight are Motorhead if the Canadians were really the Soviets who institutionalized and lobotomized Lemmy while forcing him at gunpoint to cart around a potent IV drip of anti-psychotics and sedatives for the rest of his life.

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Profanatica Sickened by Holy Host / The Grand Master Sessions CD Reissue

Hells Heabangers Records has reissued most of Profanatica‘s works from the third millennium on CD. Including are bonus discs for completionists and obsessive compulsive collectors. Profanatitas de Domonatia, Disgusting Blasphemies Against God, and Sickened by Holy Host / The Grand Master Sessions are all pressed on gold CDs like Mobile Fidelity Sound Lab and DCC CDs from the nineties for maximum shinyness and all include bonus CDs of live shows from the early 90s that will probably be only listened to in the car or as background music at work. The Grand Master Sessions was previously vinyl only and is the one that most of the die hard underground fans who moved onto superior digital technological formats will be picking up.

Order them from Hells Headbangers here if your obsessive compulsive disorder demands it.

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Hells Headbangers Restocks Nihilism

nihiilsm brett stevens

Brett Steven’s Nihilism: A Philosophy Based In Nothingness And Eternity sold out quickly at Hells Headbangers’ metal distro so Hells Headbangers has just restocked it! You know you want it hard. Now you can get it hard fast again with DHL international shipping! Believe in nothing and take it like man! How do you expect to reach emptiness without mentally climaxing into the vortex? Are you man enough?

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Sadistic Metal Reviews 9/24/2016

shit_burning

Some sorry schmuck has to shovel it into a hole and set it on fire.

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