SAD! MetalSucks Flagrantly Plagiarizes Death Metal Underground

They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but such is not true when it’s done by a fat, zit-faced loser with fedora tattoos who calls himself “Emperor Rhombus.”  Because right now, plastered on the MetalSucks front page at the time of this writing, is a ridiculously obvious rip off of an editorial I did just a month ago.  Seriously, the damn thing is worse than when Nile blatantly stole the melody from the Candlemass song “Well of Souls” in their “Unas Slayer of the Gods” mess of a track.  Hell, it’s even worse than that top hat wearing Dimmu Borgir keyboardist replicating the piano from Magnum’s “Sacred Hour” and using it as the intro for Stormblast. But I guess that when your life is regulated to creeping out young girls at Selena Gomez concerts with your virgin-tier Electric Wizard shirt, you’re bound to spend much of your days fantasizing about being a true alpha badass like Brock Dorsey.

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Interview with Cromlech (CA)

The Canadian band Cromlech strode forth boldly onto the field of battle with the promising album “Ave Mortis” in 2013.  Honing their tactics and weapon-craft, in 2017 they released their excellent EP “Iron Guard.”  Blending doom, death, and classic heavy metal influences the mighty Cromlech is the tip of the spear in the coming resurgence of epic power metal. In a brief lull between battles, the members of Cromlech most nobly took a few minutes to answer some interview questions.

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/smr/ Sadistic Metal Reviews: Baby Gasser Edition

 

SADISTIC METAL REVIEWS

https://www.deathmetal.org/tag/sadistic-metal-reviews/

HEAVY FUCKING METAL:

https://www.deathmetal.org/metal/

https://www.deathmetal.org/site-map/

https://www.deathmetal.org/category/faq/

>b-but I heard heavy metal is dead!

https://www.deathmetal.org/news/

https://www.deathmetal.org/review/

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Atlantean Kodex Live Album is Bad

At first glance, this album boasts a cool cover and impressively long song lengths, making a strong first impression. Then I hit play. It didn’t take long to realize this is really, really bad live album. It is not tightly played at all. The two guitars are not in sync and neither are the drums. You have to suffer through really bad lyrics like: “Onward to the sun” and “Destiny is calling!”. Everything is really bad waltzy Sabbath imitation but really boring. I can fairly say that this album qualifies as epic German cheese. So of course it will be popular. The singer sounds like the guy who sang those Budweiser ads Real Men of Genius.
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Thoughts on Composition

Metal music inherited the album concept from pop music. Originally, records could only hold about 3-5 minutes of sound on each side. In the 1940s new techniques allowed each side of a record to hold around 20 minutes of music on each side. Because of these limitations, the ‘single’ became the standard composition in popular music. As LPs became more prominent, the single, played over the radio, was used as the marketing device to sell albums: a couple of catchy singles swimming in a thin grey soup of filler material. Because it is only marginally more difficult and expensive to record and produce a whole album, there are much higher profit margins on LPs than on singles. That a pop album was not a consciously constructed artistic whole is borne by the fact that pop ‘greatest hits’ albums are easy to listen to, straightforward affairs. Consider a greatest hits album from a metal artist… at best it is off-putting and at worst it is a flaccid, confusing affair because all the songs have been removed from their appropriate context.

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Introduction to Power Metal, Part I: Origins and Influences

(Join DMU Legend Johan Pettersson for what may be the most expansive analysis of power metal ever presented in the first of a 3 part series.  Listen to the accompanying suggested listening here)

Of all the subgenres and styles that fall within the metal spectrum (hence excluding unmitigated relapses into rock such as death’n’roll, stoner, nu- and indie metal), power metal most definitely counts as the one that has received the highest amount of scorn and ridicule from critics, fans and outsiders alike. (more…)

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Have You Droned Anyone Recently?

There is something delicious about a drone. Maneuver the joystick, trip the flaps, train the camera, identify the subject. With a deep sigh, avoid contemplating all that is ahead, then click confirm on your control screen. Watch the brief flash and distortion on your video feed as the missile falls free and ignites. Zoom in on the target. Seconds later, a gout of flame and fountain of body parts.

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Lilou & John – Patriot Child (2018)

Most people compare this music to Motorhead, but in my mind, it resembles a fusion between Black Flag and folk music like the old Bob Seeger tracks that limousine liberals pretended to like along with their Harry Belafonte and Leonard Bernstein LPs. A strong punk energy and rhythm pervades the music while a vocal-driven melodic sense guides each song to a quasi-ironic, bittersweet but triumphant conclusion.

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Godflesh – Post Self (2018)

If someone goes on this tour, make sure to hand Justin Broadrick a telephone to signify that this album has been phoned in. As the term implies, when content creators are no longer focused on making their work significant, an “it’ll do” mentality results. This fits within what Godflesh and related Broadrick-acts have done through their careers.

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With New Song, Dimmu Borgir Officially Becomes Nightwish

In an unexpected turn of events, Mortal-Kombat-tier Norwegian opera-metallers Dimmu Borgir have gone full on symphonic power metal in their new song.  Embracing the trending female fronted power/quest metal sound that has replaced metalcore as the newest wave of a strange phenomenon known as “girlfriend metal” (the metal your girlfriend puts on while she’s cleaning the house), Dimmu have essentially robbed the sound of Nightwish, Epica, and Within Temptation while yet retaining the Hollywood-orc vocals of Shagrath.  While moments resembling early Blind Guardian are in fact an improvement over a preceding album that was almost completely devoid of guitars, this is by no means quality power metal nor is it the hybrid of older Dimmu styles that the band has been mouthing off about the past few months.

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