Kaeck – Stormkult Coming to Vinyl

Kaeck‘s Stormkult, The Best Underground Metal Album of 2015, is coming to vinyl courtesy of Heathen Tribes. The vinyl LP will feature remastered sound with a little less mud and a tad more room overhead. The LP will come in gatefold packaging befitting the lyrical and compositional themes. It will be strictly limited to 200 copies. If you are a black metal analog fanatic and miss out, you will be sorry for sure.

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Profanatica Playing Maryland Show Next Week

Profanatica are playing a one off show in suburban Silver Spring, Maryland, next week right outside of the politician-infested swamp that is Washington, D.C. This will be a good chance for capital area fanatics to see Profanatica live if they missed them at the Maryland Deathfest pre-show last year. Hopefully Profanatica will change up their set list and play songs not from from Sickened by the Holy Host / The Grand Masters Session EPs and the not so good The Curling Flame of Blasphemy. Recent shows have been very heavy on compositions from those three recordings.

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Diamond Head Release “Diamonds” Video

New Wave of British Heavy Metal band Diamond Head released a new music video for the hard rock “Diamonds” off their recent self-titled Diamond Head record to promote their upcoming US tour. Diamond Head infamously committed career suicide with the awful Canterbury just a few years after releasing the super influential to Metallica, Lightning to the Nations.

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Crackhead Bobby Liebling Assaults Elderly Mother

Former and probably current crack smoker Bobby Liebling of long running stoner rock, pseudo-metal band Pentagram was arrested for apparently assaulting his elderly mother, causing him to be dropped from Pentagram’s upcoming European tour. Liebling famously was filmed smoking crack in his elderly parents’ basement in suburban Maryland for the Pentagram documentary Last Days Here. Liebling’s drug problems and abhorrent personal behavior have long sabotaged any chance Pentagram may have had at creative of commercial success.

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Suffocation Release “Return To The Abyss” Lyric Video

Suffocation released a new lyric video of their upcoming, awful phoned-in album, …Of the Dark Light. Suffocation have dumbed themselves down to mediocre speed metal with generic riffs rehashed from their classic material prior to their 1998, post Despise the Sun breakup. Return to the Abyss is incredibly boring. Do not buy this phoned in excuse to tour. Do not see Suffocation on tour without Frank Mullen.

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Evil – Evil’s Message (1984)


Article by George Psalmanazar.

Evil were a Danish metal band from the mid 1980s often held up as yet another “lost gem” by record collectors as their sole studio release, the Evil’s Message EP, has never been reissued except for a hard to find, bargain basement compilation with French heavy metal band Sortilège’s self-titled EP in the late 90s. Evil’s Message is far from actually being good though; it is nothing special, bog standard Motorhead and Metallica style speed metal.

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Emperor Prepare Anthems… Anniversary Tour

Emperor are currently preparing to tour in celebration of the twentieth anniversary their second album, the third rate Anthems to the Welkin at Dusk. While Emperor kept on wearing armor, Anthems to the Welkin at Dusk saw Emperor simplify their trademark complex, almost symphonic Norwegian black metal sound down to two to three note speed metal influenced riffs with neo-classical wank leads in conventional verse-chorus-verse heavy metal songs to appeal to a wider, Wacken-going audience.

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Bangladesh Deporting Krisiun

Bangadesh continued the worldwide governmental war on mediocre speed metal by arranging to deport mediocre Brazilian speed metal band Krisiun for supposedly blaspheming against monotheism and Islam in the lyrics to their music. Krisiun were in the overwhelmingly Muslim third world country to play a sold-out festival. Bangladeshi metal fans should man up and listen to better metal bands now. Krisiun then confirmed that they were special snowflakes who believe in equality for all people, creeds, things, places, trees, and toilet paper brands regardless of their quality, proficiency, or absorbency:

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USA Deports Evil Invaders

Funderground Belgian speed metal band Evil Invaders were deported from the United States according to their Funbook page for not having the appropriate work visas to play a metal festival in Milwaukee. Evil Invaders were not being paid to play the festival. The festival organizers were only covering Evil Invaders plane tickets and transportation cost for the band and their equipment. Since the festival organizers were still charging for tickets and making money, Evil Invaders needed an appropriate work visa, which they did not have, thus they were deported.

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