Metal-Archives’ Marxist Mania

Article contributed to Death Metal Underground by Richard Sullivan.

Western civilization is currently gripped in a culture war unlike any that preceded this one. You may ask what makes it so different than the others, considering the West witnessed a similar one of its kind back in the late 1950s with the emergence of the New Left. Arguably, there’s never been a real difference in the left’s rhetoric. For as long as anyone cares to remember, white, heterosexual, “cisgender” men, who maintain the “capitalistic, racialized, cisnormative patriarchy” have always been at the center of their ideological attacks. The only thing that has changed has been their ability to have said rhetoric heard beyond the confines of university lecture halls. It was rare to encounter an enlightened™ human™ bombarding you with vitriol and threats of violence – because you failed to recognize the intersectionality between race™, gender™, and sexuality™ – outside a gender studies class. Of course, these things still occur, but with greater frequency, and to the point where a flash mob of overweight, hipster beta males twerking in tutus in a school’s atrium is viewed as them just “expressing themselves”, but, more boldly, as an act of defiance against conventional norms of masculinity.

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Liberal Music Fans Fooled by Grindcore Charity Deception

A massive amount of gullible liberal retards have fallen for a masterful charity deception running on Bandcamp via a “grindcore band” called Anal Trump. The band’s new album If you Want to Qualify for Health Insurance, Then Maybe You Should Have Gotten Raped? currently is the service’s top selling album despite the entire album being less than 60 seconds and offering virtually no music content. Priced at $5.00 (though users are able to pay more), the band claims 100% of “net proceeds” will be donated to the charity RAINN. This is in fact a cleverly worded deception as Bandcamp’s payout model takes 15% of all sales plus a processing fee (varying based on the amount), meaning that instead of donating $5.00 directly to the charity and getting nothing in return, users are donating $3.95 to the charity and $1.05 to Bandcamp and getting nothing in return.

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Indie Blog Laments as Maryland Deathfest is Mainstreamed

The hilarious leftist parody of metal will be celebrated in force this weekend as Maryland Deathfest completes its transformation into Coachilla-lite. While it’s been painfully obvious that all festival culture has gone fully mainstream as futureless millennials continue to spend money they don’t have on things they don’t need there are still many in the hipster sphere that can’t grasp the loss of counter culture to the mainstream. Maryland Deathfest continues this trend with praise from mainstream propaganda editorial Newsweek and lamentations from liberal snowflake blog Invisible Oranges occurring in the same week.

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Bestial Evil Paying to Play with Angelcorpse

Social justice warrior deathcore band Bestial Evil are one of the seven openers for Angelcorpse at a pay to play show in Washington, DC tonight. Yes this is the same Bestial Evil you think it is, the antifascist and antiracist and probably Black Lives Matter supporting deathcore band whose antics and temper tantrums have been covered on Death Metal Underground Past. This time Bestial Evil, despite their antifascist stance, are opening for Angelcorpse. The bassist and vocalist of Angelcorpse is none other than Order From Chaos front man, existential social Darwinist and author of The Conqueror Manifesto Pete Helmkamp.

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More Free Press for Shining

Swedish emo black ‘n’ roll pop punk band Shining has been kicked off a show in the fat hipster junkie haven of Portland, leaving the funderground’s communist media pussies and useless indie rock blogs abuzz about “alleged” acts of shock rock front man Kvarforth. Though not charged with a crime at this time, the self mutilating schizophrenic man kisser has been accused of “violent, racist, sexist, nazi behavior,” completing the full checklist of character assassinations attempted by the left on a daily basis. But apparently unbeknownst to all of these out of touch basement-dwelling butt rock journalists this is the exact GG-Allin LARPing Kvarforth has been doing at every single show and in every single interview for over two decades. Therefore, this mass collusion has accomplished nothing outside of promoting Shining and their upcoming tour dates.

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Exposing the Hypocrisy of Liberal Metal Journalism


In an age where the culture war has reached all corners of American life it is essential to understand the immense significance of the extreme metal frontier. As a liberal movement on the brink of extinction adapts a full blown communist agenda and wages totalitarian warfare against all beneficiaries of natural selection and individual freedom it is mandatory for the iron willed men and women of metal to defend the most liberated of all musical genres. By defeating these dystopian LARPers on the battlefield of metal culture we will accelerate their complete evisceration and ultimately emancipate the underground metal genre from it’s stagnant state. Therefore we must understand the enemy to swiftly and decisively destroy it.

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Welsh University Wages War on Men to “Embrace Cultural Diversity”

Cardiff Metropolitan University has banned the use of of English words that it considers masculine in order to “embrace cultural diversity”. Every single word in the English language with “man” in it is now banned due to social justice warriors, communists, and feminists waging war against masculinity and wishing to neuter all mankind into mediocrity. Violaters of Newspeak face academic discipline and expulsion.

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Southern Poverty Law Center Says Milk Is Racist

The Southern Poverty Law Center’s Hatewatch feed and Mic Media claim milk is “a new, creamy symbol of white racial purity in Donald Trump’s America”. Yes as a white man with orange skin is president, cow’s milk is racist even though European, African, Middle Eastern, and Indian populations are all lactose tolerant. Cheese and yogurt sauce anyone?

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Gizmodo Calls For Discord Censorship

Social justice warrior ricer gadget platform Gizmodo has called for censorship of the Discord chat client. Discord is rapidly replacing Skype and internet relay chat (IRC) among PC gamers, political junkies, and well-connected people due to the seamless integration between text and voice along with the collapse of Skype after being purchased by Microsoft. The social justice warriors and cultural Marxists will stop at nothing until every possible forum for dissent is reduced to singing hymns to a portrait of a dear supreme leader who would love to send anyone who annoys him, including antifa nags, to reeducation camps as work will set them free.

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Metalgate: Facebook Censors Graveland

Leftist social media propagandists and sellers of personal information Facebook decided to play Thought Police and delete Rob Darken‘s two official Graveland pages permanently. Facebook has been caught before pandering to social justice warrior whiners who want to keep the internet a safe space free of all speech from any one who doesn’t shout the slogans from their little red books in the street. This new act of corporate censorship was probably due to anti-fascists reporting Graveland after they attacked and shutdown the Messe des Morts festival in Montreal a few weeks ago.

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