Molested – Blod-draum Reissue Pre-orders Up

Dark Symphonies announced that they are reissuing Norwegian death metal band Molested‘s only full studio album Blod-draum later this month from the original tapes. Along with the new master from the original analog tapes (not the original CD just compressed for losers with Iphones), a new remix from the multitrack studio tapes will be included on the disc. The CD is available for preordering from Dark Symphonies right now.

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Marijuana

Some time ago, metalheads at a concert lit up a dingy joint, covered with pocket lint and packed full of brick weed, the uncured Cannabis Sativa grown wild in large Mexican fields and then compressed in trash compactors, crushing the seeds and stems and infusing the psychoactive flowers with oils and plant sugars.

There is only one way to smoke weed:

  1. Get a good night’s sleep.
  2. Wake up and down 15 ounces of water.
  3. Make strong coffee and have two cups.
  4. Take a shotglass of strong alcohol or have a glass of wine or large beer.
  5. Carefully extract and shred a fine Cannabis Indica or Sativa hybrid (60-40 or more).
  6. Mix in 15% of a strong but non smoke cured tobacco.
  7. Place in a bong that has large capacity but allows a fast shotgun.
  8. Take three of these rips within ten minutes.

At this point, the psychedelic potential of the weed becomes most powerful. Synergistic effects with Nicotine, Caffeine and alcohol aid this process.

Repeat as necessary at two-hour intervals.

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Homebrewing FAQ

A cultured human being should pursue a good hobby. It’s somewhat more interesting if said hobby involves a mild vice or foible. The hobby should also develop skill and produce a satisfactory end product. It should make the person somewhat unique amongst a group of peers and allow them to develop camaraderie with their fellow hobbyists. It becomes a Schelling Point so to speak.

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Sadistic Metal Reviews 12-06-16

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Congratulations! Your society continues to squeeze out lumpy, furry, greasy and fragrant turds into the fresh bedding. Your government is corrupt; almost everyone in business and society is a robotic zombie; your mass culture is garbage and your jobs, jails. People are miserable inside but refuse to acknowledge it for fear of seeming weak.

On top of all of that, your future is grim as you slip further into third-world levels of filth, disorder, promiscuity, corruption, disorganization, perversity, crime and rotted infrastructure. How’s that whole modern society thing — consumerism, democracy, mass media — working out for you?

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Sadistic Metal Reviews 11-27-2016

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Thanksgiving is a merry time of the year but the bender has to end with more Sadistic Metal Reviews!

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Kretchmer – Music in the key of Major (2016)

kretchmer-music-in-the-key-of-major
Article by Lance Viggiano.

2016 has been a dismal year for metal in terms of albums one might want to carry with them for the rest of their aimless and futile material embodiment. Fortunately, other genres are not so bereft of endearing symbolic language. Kretchmer is an electro composer who draws from the “braindance” acid of middle period Aphex Twin and the romantic melodic sensibilities of Kraftwerk. Each track possess an underlying narrative whose structure reveals itself via the gradual buildup of layers to a moderate density. A primary motif is looped or varied upon through the course of a given track. To further fill space, chords occupy the background and often provide a resolve to the melody as it cycles. Par for the course for this music, the drum and synth bass tracks play with the open space in between musical themes and function as harmonic rather than strictly rhythmic components. The emergent polyphonic circuitry pays tribute to classical sensibilities but eschews the theatrical; drawing instead from the grounded drama of the moving body.

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Deathspell Omega – The Synarchy of Molten Bones (2016)

deathspell-omega-the-synarchy-of-molten-bones
Article by Lance Viggiano.

Deathspell Omega return with another uninspired and uninspiring record entitled The Synarchy of Molten Bones. Their last record, Paracletus, was built on a foundation of Voivod-lite chords executed with the alt metal sensibilities of The Dillinger Escape Plan. In an effort to build ambience, additional guitar tracks would attempt to produce a microtonal effect without actual production of microtones; just more dissonance. These techniques were then deployed over pop-leaning melodies which become pronounced should one decide to hum the otherwise atonal morass.

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