Liberal Music Fans Fooled by Grindcore Charity Deception

A massive amount of gullible liberal retards have fallen for a masterful charity deception running on Bandcamp via a “grindcore band” called Anal Trump. The band’s new album If you Want to Qualify for Health Insurance, Then Maybe You Should Have Gotten Raped? currently is the service’s top selling album despite the entire album being less than 60 seconds and offering virtually no music content. Priced at $5.00 (though users are able to pay more), the band claims 100% of “net proceeds” will be donated to the charity RAINN. This is in fact a cleverly worded deception as Bandcamp’s payout model takes 15% of all sales plus a processing fee (varying based on the amount), meaning that instead of donating $5.00 directly to the charity and getting nothing in return, users are donating $3.95 to the charity and $1.05 to Bandcamp and getting nothing in return.

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Dark Economic Truths of Underground Metal

Recently many of the other “metal” websites, blogs, publications et cetera have been doing articles about the business side of music industry. Unsurprisingly noneĀ of these articles had the testicular fortitude to address the ugly reality of the underground metal economy as they are written by either slaves to the machine itself or losers who genuinely believe that they have “careers” in music which heavily depend on acceptance by the community. Since the Death Metal Underground staff bow to no masters social or corporate, we are in the rare position give you the truth in its rawest form. So with absolute disregard for the powers that be in metal, let’s take an honest look inside this machine to see how it really works.

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MetalSucks Editor Publishes Love of Nazism

Article contributed to Death Metal Underground by Cullen Toner.

Longtime MetalSucks editor and self-proclaimed snowflake Emperor Rhombus released a 1,256 word editorial professing his love for Nazi culture and aesthetics on the site’s apparently unregulated front page. The move was seen as an obvious reach to the NatSoc community as MetalSucks attempts to appease the young users of the glowingly popular 4chan image boards by creating articles to reflect the national socialist posts on /pol. The article was immediately praised by the legions of anti-Semites that frequent the site’s comment’s section as they proclaiming their support of the site’s newfound Nazi sympathy with comments like “Hitler did nothing wrong” and “(Emperor Rhombus) knows what is good for the goyim.”

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Exposing the Hypocrisy of Liberal Metal Journalism


Article contributed to Death Metal Underground by Cullen Toner.

In an age where the culture war has reached all corners of American life it is essential to understand the immense significance of the extreme metal frontier. As a liberal movement on the brink of extinction adapts a full blown communist agenda and wages totalitarian warfare against all beneficiaries of natural selection and individual freedom it is mandatory for the iron willed men and women of metal to defend the most liberated of all musical genres. By defeating these dystopian LARPers on the battlefield of metal culture we will accelerate their complete evisceration and ultimately emancipate the underground metal genre from it’s stagnant state. Therefore we must understand the enemy to swiftly and decisively destroy it.

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Hellbound.ca Posts “The Wild Beast Manifesto” in Response to MetalSucks

Canadian mainstream and funderground metal blog Hellbound.ca responded to MetalSucksThe MetalSucks Manifesto by publishing their own “The Wild Beast Manifesto” about how metal should not be neutered according to political correctness despite any single persons chosen political opinions.

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#MetalGate: The MetalSucks Manifesto

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Nu-metal and metalcore website MetalSucks posted the “The MetalSucks Manifesto” today, reaffirming their stance as communist social justice warriors. Donald Trump’s triumph in the 2016 United States presidential election apparently did not dishearten their leftist delusions. A neighbor to the MetalSucks headquarters in Axl Rosenberg’s Brooklyn tenement apartment has revealed exclusive insider information to Death Metal Underground about the activities of the MetalSucks politburo of Axl Rosenberg, Vince Neilstein, and Emperor Rhombus during the week following Trump’s victory.

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#Metalgate: MetalSucks Commenters Expose Kim Kelly

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Vince Neilstein and Axl Rosenberg of metalcore and nu-metal web site MetalSucks are counting down who they deluded themselves into believing are “The twenty five most important people in metal”. So far only two of their picks have had anything to do with heavy metal at all: Fenriz, who as true communists they chose for his working class background and refusal to leave his job in the Norwegian postal service rather than his music accomplishments in Darkthrone and Rob Halford of Judas Priest for being gay so MetalSucks can push the liberal social narrative to twelve year olds and urban hipsters with the critical thinking skills of twelve year old girls.

The most controversial choice of the two MetalSucks commissars-in-chief was crustfund false journalist Kim Kelly for being a female scenester and selective social justice warrior Neilstein and Rosenberg personally know. The communists appreciated her exposing “vitriol, hate and misogyny” and “nazi black metal bands” mostly in line with their political and social agendas for the leftist new world order that has hopefully just been vanquished democratically.

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